WOULD THOU INSPECT THEE KÖNIG???

Reblog if your blog is boopable-safe so you can get all the (probably new) achievements. I don’t care about notes I just want boops

Immortal souls ch1

CW: uhh...this shits kinda sad ngl, death, details of injuries and said death, swearing, dont think there's anything too bad but let me know if there is

The day was bright as you lay in the field, the grass swaying softly against your face, exhausted from the day spent running around, completing errands for the villagers and then proceeding to goof off with simon. Simon, who was currently beside you in the cool blades of grass, your pinkie fingers hooked together, too embarrassed to properly hold hands. You both speak soft promises into the sky above, the blues and pinks of the lowering yet still bright sun being covered by the patchy pattern of leaves from the tree that you and Simon had taken shelter under, being the witness to your words.

The two of you began your daily walk back, all laughs and jokes, smiles and subtle flirts.

"hah! you should have seen the fruit stall owner! the way he was chasing after me just for a simple apple."

Simon recounts his adventures of the day before you had met up for the afternoon. You sigh playfully at your thief of a friend.

"honestly, si....what am i going to do with you, hm?"

Simon smirks, loving the sound of your nickname for him on your tongue, the way you shortened his name sounded so much better than the harsh way that everyone else says it. He's about to make a crude comment most likely but you both get interrupted as you see flames and hear the distant yet deafening cries of the fellow villagers that echoes through the once peaceful afternoon.

The two of you run, as fast as you could, desperate to help, lungs burning as they frantically search for oxygen in the thick smokey air. You frantically search for your family, friends or anyone who could explain this sudden chaos.Y

Through the smoke of your burning village you and Simon come across a group of men holding torches, wearing odd metal masks, armed with blades, arrows and spears, things you'd hardly seen before in the shelter of your peaceful village. Though you both knew that it could be nothing good.

You pause, never having been in such a life threatening situation before, your instincts and common sense weren't quite up to par and why should they be when all you've known was peace, the only chaos was when Simon stole something from the market.

"um...escuse me gentlemen? Do you know-"

Your polite and timid words are abruptly cut short as they shoot an arrow, the metal tip barely missing your widened eyes and instead causing your cheek to bleed. You were frozen, you felt like crying, being sick and running away all at once. The overwhelming feeling of having danger so suddenly thrown in your face. Luckily for you, Simon managed to snap out of his own trance, grabbing you tightly and pulling you along.

"come on! we need to go!"

You run to the forrest in hopes of losing the men, weaving through the old and and sturdy trees, memories of the times you and Simon would spend hours up in the branches briefly flash in your mind before being promptly tugged again by Simon to the side, your eyes catch a glimpse of the spear that had just about missed your head.

The heavy breathing of you both echoes through the darkening forrest, your warm breath creating clouds of vapour in the air, your lungs sting with the sharpness of adrenaline and exercise.

The strange men clad in metal and weapons can be heard, their chasing relentless, voices yelling at each other to guide more of them towards you. It goes silent for a few minutes, the only noise in the seemingly empty forrest being you and Simon's heavy breathing which you both desperately tried to quiet.

You and Simon turn to each other, a smile of relief on both your faces. You were finally safe, you began to think of all the ways to save the villagers, maybe you could find a nearby lord? Or maybe they'd just leave on their own?

But it doesn't take long until everything around you seems to go dull, that relief you felt just moments ago going cold, as you watch the spear tear through Simon's chest, the cracking noise of sharpened metal breaking bones and flesh of the man you adored embedded in your memories forever. You fall to the ground with him, almost as if you had been wounded yourself. The strange men seemed to believe so anyways as they left, not even checking if you two were dead, almost like this whole thing was just for their own sick enjoyment, enjoying the pain of families watching each other die, their only relief being the hope of seeing everyone in the afterlife.

As you fell to the floor everything felt dark, dull, an empty feeling of loss covered you. The moss on the forest floor was cool against the heat of your living body. You could see the way his eyes were fading, that beautiful brown that made you think of nature and warmth, going a ghostly grey. Your hands grasp onto him.

"no...no,.no, no... si! Please dont, you have to stay with me. Im begging you! I cant be without you...si, please"

A tight feeling in your heart takes away the rest of your breath, you can't speak properly anymore, only managing garbled pleas as if that would save the dying man in your arms, as if that would get rid of the spear in his back that pierced through his chest. Through your begging you still couldn't manage to utter those three words that you'd both been hanging off the edge of your tongues, those three words that was so obvious between you yet because they were never spoken neither of you dared to go further than friends.

The trees suddenly felt like they were watching, mocking you for your feeble love, laughing at how easily he was dying. They loomed over you, the bark twisting into cruel smiles as you begged Simon to stay with you.

He tries to brave a smile, barely breathing as he gets out his final words.

"god....I love it when you call me that"

And with that you saw the playful light drain from his eyes, that oh so beautiful brown gone pale.

You cried, you don't know for how long but you remember seeing the sun disappear in the corner of your eye more than once. As you cried your grip on Simon's icy body only got tighter, as if you could transfer your warmth to him to bring him back.

i want whatever these idiots have goin on

bro my neighbours dog never shuts tf up, like constantly barking and howling that it sounds like a kid throwing a tantrum, it's creepy and annoying. And now some prick started fireworks right outside my damn window (not legit but like a house across, too bloody close anyways) and now the dogs gone off again 😤

is there a holiday just for arseholes tonight or somethin?? normally i love fireworks but not tonight ig.

Cosplaying a black character

is it allowed? don't come and like send me death threats or anything, i just want to know because i think ekko is fuckin awesome.

because I've seen black cosplayers do white characters (which is fair since there ain't many black characters in like anime and shit)

but is it allowed the other way round? like im not gonna do blackface or dumb shit like that, just like his outfit and his face paint.

if it's not allowed then does anyone know an arcane character that has a buzz cut? preferably a dude but eh.🤷‍♂️

im asking because i don't have money for wigs and can't be arsed growing out my hair just for a cosplay lmao.

tw:blood

i hate the taste of blood, makes me feel sick (one too many nosebleeds as a kid) but ngl, if i was kissing someone and there was blood involved......that's kinda hot.

this is kinda relating to my other post about fighting someone lol

imagine fighting someone, and you make their nose all bloodied and they split your lip and to make it up to each other you end up kissing, tasting both of your blood together

bro waking up after going to sleep with a headache??

i felt like i just met god, didn't even realise I'd fallen asleep until i woke up like "???am i dead??"

would not recommend but at least my headache went away

Bio thingy

hey im inspector me you can call me inspector for short or whatever tbh. I write a bunch of random stuff. im getting ready for university so i can't promise reliable or regular updates but my asks are always open! You can ask me pretty much anything unless it's too much into my irl life (like what school did you go to and stuff like that, things like my favourite animal or trivial stuff is fine :] )

you are welcome to ask for requests as long as it follows the rough guidelines below, if you're not sure ask anyways and I'll let you know!

What I do

Male Reader

gender neutral reader

anime

haikyuu

jjk (jujitsu kaisen) ((I've only watched the anime))

black clover

blue exorcist

one piece (currently on episode 212 but I've already had a few spoilers lol)

demon slayer

hxh

dorohedoro

dan da dan

T.V

Merlin (BBC)

Titans (DC show)

The Boys (haven't finished yet but im almost done i think)

Books

Percy Jackson (im not as involved with the fandom and I've only read the basic series)

Skulduggery pleasant

Half bad (Bastard son of the devil himself) (both the show and the books)

other

rick and morty

call of duty (mostly ghost tbh but ask away)

What I dont do

rape (i feel like i shouldn't have to write this but ive seen a few things on this site so y'know)

paedophilia

incest (of any kind)

male pregnancy (it's just not my cuppa)

Abuse (makes me kinda uncomfortable to write characters like that)

Fem reader (im not a woman, i did try to write it but it just felt off to me, if you really want me to write something with Fem reader and it hasn't got much to do with plot i might be able to do it but if not it'll just be GN)

I might have to add a few if I get any more requests but for now this is it.

If you want something that isn't mentioned on here dont be afraid to ask or even just chat. I watch a lot of anime and other medias and i dont mind researching something just to write it for you.

My boundaries

I dont really have much lmao. i dont mind swearing or dark humour just remember to be respectful :] i won't tolerate any racism, homophobia or anything like that.

also, since im new im still figuring out tags so my apologies if i tag something wrong, let me know and I'll fix it asap!

my tags:

the inspectors hoard - just reblogs of cool stuff or random shit.

the inspector thinks - drabbles, head cannons, random thoughts.

the inspector writes - writing obviously.

the inspectors interrogation - responding to asks.

the inspectors rants - unrelated to writing, just me talking about random stuff.

Eggs: egg fried rice or eggy bread, anything else makes me feel sick.

Steak: not bothered as long as it aint raw or burnt, so probably medium.

Milk: again not bothered, usually whatever's in the fridge lol, so semi skimmed. i guess.

Alcohol: havent tried any, closest thing to alcohol is bitter shandy and ginger beer, highly recommend those, delish. (they're just fizzy drinks)

Warm drink: always love a good cuppa (tea) no sugar tho. hot chocolate's nice too. but @xi1dius cup-a-soup is not a fucking drink, it is a crime against god.

caiman from dorohedoro

sorry idk how to change image sizes

Omg do you have a Valentine because I could kiss you for this

Big strong lizard head man with no memories. Nothing in his lizard head but his love for gyoza and his bff who makes food for him. Fighter and a biter, mostly so the little man in his mouth can interrogate people. No I will not elaborate

Reminder, the premise is “would a normie think it’s weird to find them attractive?” (Would they have to “hear me out?”) NOT “smash-or-pass”