Do You Think Someone Who Eats Moss Has Common Sense?

I definitely need to. I can't be bothered, however. I must prioritize my research.

hear me out: the angel from the amazing digital circus

I have no idea who that is. One moment.

Hearing you out. Hearing you out so hard my ears are bleeding.

I would like to add a few of my own!

Ignore the sheep costume.

PROOF THAT YOU CAN TAKE ANY IMAGE FROM YOUR GALLERY AND MAKE IT INTO A SICK ASS ALBUM COVER WITH JUST ONE PARENTAL ADVISORY STICKER

I got fish coloring pages at the aquarium. One of the workers let me take some once the kids there each got one

My friend helped me make Sonic and Shadow

I see I did the "shoes" wrong on Sonic.

We just got our dog back from the kennel after vacation, and apparently he though we were just leaving him. On the way home, Stanley went into Subway, and now Marshall thinks he's being abandoned "again".

He's been panting and whining for the past ten minutes.

Also, we did end up taking the seat belts off of the windows. They're no longer necessary.

stanford i got a buncha metal wires stuck all up in my beard. @ fiddlesfords

Not again. At this point, I'm just going to make you shave it off.

I mean no offense, but do you ever wash your hair at all? Naturally, this information would change nothing for you.

Stanley keeps telling me that my hair isn't fluffy, it's actually curly and I'm just "not taking care of it". I said that wouldn't make sense, because almost no one else in our family has curly hair. We all have fluffy, unkempt hair. He said to just try washing my hair without aggressively brushing it out afterwards, "and even if it doesn't work, just do it to prove me wrong".

I am going to wash my hair, and I'll come back to tell you all when it inevitably turns out to just be a fluffy mess again.

Do you have any kids besides @daughter-of-the-author ?

More specifically, are you a motherfucker?

I can't say for certain how many children I have. @daughter-of-the-author is technically not "my" child, since she belongs to an alternate version of myself.

No matter how many potential children I have, I can say with certainty that I have never been asked to pay child support.

Stanley keeps telling me that my hair isn't fluffy, it's actually curly and I'm just "not taking care of it". I said that wouldn't make sense, because almost no one else in our family has curly hair. We all have fluffy, unkempt hair. He said to just try washing my hair without aggressively brushing it out afterwards, "and even if it doesn't work, just do it to prove me wrong".

I am going to wash my hair, and I'll come back to tell you all when it inevitably turns out to just be a fluffy mess again.

hey there paranormal bottom

Don't call me that. I am not above violence.

The nickname generator clearly had it out for me. "Paranormal bottom" feels too specific to be completely random.

And that is not an official nickname! I did that as a joke!

Hey, he doesn't wear the stupid hat anymore. He's switched over to stupid goggles. And he has a mansion.

first 5 faceless emojis are how your summers gonna go