Reptile Break For The Reptile Broken

What the hell 😭

Atleast im lovable but what the heck you guys better fight for me.

Let's all be in a TV show!!!

> Do this quiz

> do this picrew (Based on urself + quiz answers)

> tag ppl

> profit.

Tags (/nf ofc):

@mxlilly @circus-of-horror @yourleastfavoriteguyinthechair @microsoupmouse @the-firefly-jar-system @punkrockinchair @theplushiesystem @coded-pup @florasolarsystem + ANYONE else who wants to join

Sanji x transmasc reader, smut, gentle dom? Aaaaa idk how request fully work!!

Hi i rlly wanna do this but I don't know what ur dysphoria triggers are. I tried asking on subreddits and searching it up but it all jsut said everyone is different. This is kinda an old request ik but if ur still there and can say what ur comfy with and not that'd be rlly helpful since ive seen posts about how fanfic can trigger dysphoria and I don't want to bum someone out. If you dont respond Ill just have to write it as best as I can tho, so if i trigger something cant rlly do much about it. Smut and a bottom transmasc reader is more complicated since theres more genitalia involved and thats more personalized than just avoiding describing feminine clothes or nicknames.

wish you could see what asks you sent because sometimes i be sending one and take a nap and then i'm like "wait did i really send it or was that a dream or did i forget to send it"

what if his mom was just short

tell me im wrong, you wont. Luffy having stunt growth and several other underlining problems outside of the 10 years off the life thing.

I realized a post i worked pretty hard on, and im proud of, Roots Of Suffering, kinda flopped. Though tbf i did write it near the start of my writing journey on tumblr. Still, it might be because I wrote it all at once and its over 5000 words all in one chapter. Not much, but also i know tumblr prefers smaller chapters. So I thought about breaking it up so it's multi chapter, 2 or so, so people dont feel as intimidated to read it all at once. That way they can read one part, then another later without losing their place. Should i repost it to do that or just keep it the way it is as a one shot?

this was more well recieved than i thought. I kinda assumed it would get like 2 likes and thats it lol since the idea is kinda stupid

It's YOURS

Zoro x reader. GN!Reader. Platonic. 643 words. Crack fic

Desc - You walk through a forest and find Zoro lookalikes

The Strawhats walk through a forest, some looking around excitedly while others are more tame. It's alright, but things get a lot better. While walking around you spot something, marimos. Your eyes widen and you run to Sanji while he speaks to Nami, “Nami-swan just know I’ll protect yo-” snatching him by the arm and dragging him over to the marimos in the middle of his oath. Before he can say anything you turn his head to the moss balls.

“Look!” The both of you stare and Sanji takes a moment to process before grinning mischievously. You’ve unlocked something.

“Hey, Zoro!” The cook calls over the swordsman, who walks over thinking it’s something important from the use of his name. That’s quickly thrown out, though. “Look, we found your siblings.” Sanji says while pointing, Zoro follows the direction before scowling. He should’ve known it was something like this.

“You called me over for this?” He’s irritated. “If this is my family then every stupid swirl is yours!” He yells, butting heads with Sanji once his grin faded to anger. Meanwhile, you get your own idea and start picking the moss balls out of the water and stuffing them into your clothes. Uncomfortable but this’ll be worth it.

“Zoro, Zoro.” You call to him, which takes a few times before he finally turns to you.

“What!?” He spots you with a round stomach, your clothes wet with water. “The hell are you doing.”

“Zoro, I’m pregnant.” He stares at you with an annoyed and shocked expression, he can’t believe you’re doing this. You squat down and start pushing like you’re giving birth. “NnnGNGGH!!” The moss balls plop out of your clothes onto the ground. “And they’re yours.”

…

Sanji bursts into laughter and Zoro clenches his teeth. “Stop messing around!” You pick the marimos up and look at him with sadness.

“You don’t accept them?”

“As if!” He barks at you and your eyes widen in faux shock.

“...I’m a single parent..” You look away dramatically and Sanji falls to the ground with tears running down his face from laughter.

“You’re both stupid.” As he says that Robin walks over, curious.

“What’s going on?” She asks and you walk to her while holding your moss children.

“I gave birth,” You hold them up. “but he doesn’t accept them.” You look at Zoro with sorrow. He looks at Robin in disbelief at you but she frowns.

“How horrible.” His jaw drops.

“You too!?” The swordsman yells as Robin wraps her arms around you, comforting you in these trying times.

“Huh? What’s happening?” Luffy stretches down from a tree branch.

“Zoro’s abandoning his children after they were just born.” Robin states and Luffy gasps.

“Zoro! That’s not nice!” The captain admonishes Zoro, completely skipping over any actual logic.

“I can’t believe this.” The other Strawhats continue to gather around as you explain your tearful story dramatically until everyone is comforting you, making Zoro seem heartless while he stands there.

‘How did I become the bad guy here?’ He thinks to himself as Usopp and Nami send him dirty looks. You break from their grasp and slowly walk to your children’s father, holding them out to him.

“Zoro.. please… hold them..” You say softly he stares at the moss uncomfortably, then up at you and the others’ encouraging expressions.

“I…” He falters, starting to give into this weird peer pressure as he takes the wet blobs in his arms.

“How’s being a dad?” You put a hand on his shoulder.

“Uh.” They’re squishy but if he thinks about it they’re cute, in a way. “Not bad I guess-” He looks at you to find you’re barely holding in laughter. “Why am I doing this shit!?” He snaps, throwing the moss ball angrily.

“My babies!” You give chase.

“Cruel..” Usopp whispers audibly to Nami, who nods.

“Shut up!”

Yall fw the format? Thought it might look cooler and i would take advantage of the fact tumblr is more customizable than a03. IK havent written in a long time. Idk why but i coulfnt push thru it. I actually had this written messily a while back and just proofread it and post it just now so im still kinda stuck lolol. Im gonna try and get into it again, rewatching OP to try and get back in the groove 2

Im in public and a guy sitting near me has a Luffy hoodie but its specifically a Lakers Luffy hoodie, like luffy in the outfit and the lakers logo on the arms I didn't even know they made merch for it

I wish i had a really big frying pan with me so when someone does something especially stupid or mean i can bonk them over the head with it so hard with both hands on the handle that i float up a bit with a loud "THUNG" sound.

Listen. What if sanji and zoro being best friends when everyone's gone and fighting only when everyone else is around.

Funny scenario, could be true. We'll never know...

Why are you two friendly

Zoro x Sanji. Platonic. Maybe ooc since they aren't friendly towards eachother. 963 words.

“Idiot Moss”

“Shit cook”

“Musclehead.”

“Pervert brow.”

“How long are they going to do this… Are you sure we should be leaving them together on the ship, Luffy?” Usopp asks the captain.

“Huh?” He’s picking his nose, flicking a booger away. “Oh, should be fine, let's go already!” Luffy says. For once Sanji doesn’t have to buy groceries since they’re staying here for a few days, he’s already got them. The 𝓵𝓪𝓭𝓲𝓮𝓼 don’t need his help either since they’re having a girls day. So Zoro and Sanji are the ones watching the ship, Zoro for training and Sanji for meal prep. The crew wondered if that would be possible since they’re going to be the only ones there, but since no one else wanted to stay behind to watch the ship the worry subsided and people left. Luffy actually overslept since he had to do nightwatch last so him and Usopp are the last ones to go. “Well, they won’t destroy the ship so it’s fine, right?” Before Usopp can say anything else Luffy’s already dragging him off the ship, so too late. A few minutes pass and Zoro and Sanji slowly quiet down.

“You’re gonna train right? I’ll make you a protein shake.” What!? Sanji offers Zoro a smoothie?

“Oh, thanks. Put whatever in it, you’re better at figuring those things out better than me.” And Zoro actually acknowledged Sanji’s skill without being passive aggressive!? The cook nods and pats Zoro’s back.

“Don’t overdo it, if you vomit later I’ll freak out.” The swordsman nods and, with that, the both of them go to their respective places. The cook in the kitchen and musclehead in the crow’s nest. While Zoro’s working out Sanji comes in with the protein shake, setting it down next to the equipment. The weights are put down and he grabs the shake, taking a drink.

“Thanks for this, sorry you have to come all the way up here to give it to me.”

“Don’t worry about it, not that hard. I’ll have a sandwich ready for you in the kitchen. Just wash your hands before you eat so you don’t get sick.” Sanji shows concern for his friend(?)

“I will, don’t worry about it. I’ll be careful not to mess up any of the meal prep either.” The swordsman stretches.

“Even if it smells great?” Sanji asks, smiling.

“Yeah even if it smells great, I’m not that impatient.” He pushes Sanji away with a finger to his forehead.

“Laying on the compliments won’t make it go faster, but thanks for them anyway~” The blonde is satisfied, humming as he leaves.

“Good luck”

___________

“I’m here.” Zoro says while walking into the kitchen, muscles untensing with a relaxed sigh at the nice smell.

“Wash your hands.” He’s reminded again and Zoro washes them obediently. “Sandwich is on the table with some cold water.

“Nice.” A hint of excitement is heard as Moss sits down and starts to eat, the cook zooming around the kitchen to continue prepping. They start to chat, the both of them relaxed around each other. “Luffy really does anything but wait for you to cook it, doesn’t he?”

“That’s what I say! I tell him it’ll be better if he waits, that way I could actually use the meat to make a proper meal, but he doesn’t! The only thing that’s been working is the lock Franky and Usopp have made, and they still have to remove it often to repair it since he still doesn’t let up. It’s why I only meal prep when he’s away and try not to leave while it’s in the fridge because Gods know he’ll eat it even if it isn’t fully cooked.” Sanji vents to his friend, feeling nice he has someone to talk to about this.

“It’s worth it to wait, but Luffy is Luffy. Remember when he ended up getting sick because he ate the raw mest you were letting marinate?” Zoro mentions with a smirk and Sanji laughs.

“I do!” He takes bread out of the oven, smells nice. “Yet he still doesn’t learn his lesson. It at least helps that you've been keeping an eye on him too.”

“It isn’t hard, plus it takes some pressure off of you so it’s worth it.” They’re being friendly… and like it’s normal, as if they’re always this way. Laughing and chatting, cracking jokes like they’re long time friends; which they are but they aren’t supposed to be this friendly. Maybe they just don’t have a reason to fight when they’re alone? No women to be protective or perverted over so no reason to make fun of the pervert for it. Zoro tends to be harsher with other people around too, maybe it’s a pride thing. Maybe they were just like this all along.

“We’re back~” Nami’s voice is heard and Sanji’s eyes immediately turn to hearts.

“NAMI-SWANNN ROBIN-CHWANNN~! I’M SO GLAD YOU’RE BACK~~~” Sanji quickly runs out of the kitchen and makes Zoro sigh as he walks out too.

“Jesus you’re loud, maybe I should start calling you broken speaker too. We see them all the time.” The swordsman says, already harsh, which makes the blonde turn to him.

“What did you say!? Every glimpse at Nami-swan and Robin-chwan is a gift bestowed from the heavens, not that a musclehead like you would understand!”

“Hah!? I don’t understand because I’m not a pervert cook like you!” They start to argue which quickly turns into a physical fight, now things are back to a normal(?) state.

“Ugh, I’m surprised nothing’s broken.” Nami groans, looking around the ship.

“Well, maybe we didn’t have to worry as much as we though, right?” Robin chuckles, walking with Nami to leave the two men to argue. They’ll tire themselves out… eventually.

Unfair that Oda can create the cutest sunniest main character that has ever existed both as a child and as an adult and then be like "Yeah when he grows up more he gets tall and grows a beard" FUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOU