He Is So Silly And Stupid I Love Him

Come here😈

Nikolai doing some circus tricks!!

So, I've been taking circus classes for about seven years now. The aerial apparatus shown is called a lyra, basically a big hoop attached at the top with one or two spansets (I prefer two). The reference images are taken from a performance I did a couple months ago to the song Bernadette by IAMX, and I wanted to draw nikolai doing some of my favorite tricks from it.

Please don't use the reference pics without my permission. Also, lmk if I should do more of these :>

Nikolai Comic :))

commission for @/nikkigogol on twt

Movie poster inspired by The Substance movie.

EX ESPOSO SHADOW MILK x LECTOR FEMENINO Headcanons

ADVERTENCIAS: Ligero NSFW

Honestamente esta es mi primera publicación, no esperen mucho. No pienso traducir esto, usa Google Traductor en su lugar. Pregúntame lo que sea en inglés pero lo responderé en español.

🎭 Ex esposo Shadow Milk quien te pierde la pista una vez que es confinado en el árbol de plata, preocupado por la profunda tristeza que su corrupción y sentencia te traerían. A pesar de no haberse separado formalmente, fue el tiempo quien los divorció.

🎭 Ex esposo Shadow Milk que te llama “su mujer” frente a Puro Vainilla y los demás a pesar de que durante tu camino sin él, viajaste con SU enemigo. Inevitablemente siendo llamada por la souljam prístina que alguna vez le perteneció a él y bajo la que contrajiste nupcias hace eones.

🎭 Ex esposo Shadow Milk que no deja de mirar la marca dorada alrededor de tu dedo anular que combina con la suya y donde antes descansaba un anillo de oro que el tiempo se encargó de reducir a polvo.

🎭 Ex esposo Shadow Milk que sabe que nunca le serías infiel, mucho menos con PV. Y se burla de él por notar como los restos inútiles de su souljam resuenan contigo inevitablemente. Protegiéndote de sus trucos y hablando por ti al momento de enfrentarlo. Pero solo es otra forma de manifestar lo profundo que estás incrustada en la mente y corazón de aquella bestia. Tan tan profundo, que ese anhelo se irradia hacia el otro portador de la virtud de la verdad.p

🎭 Ex esposo Shadow Milk que hace un espectáculo y le hace saber a cada criatura dentro de Beast Yeast que la reina ha regresado a tomar su lugar. Y te deja tomar el control que te pertenece dentro de la torre, haciendo que puedas cambiarla a tu antojo, curvar las paredes de los pasillos, hacer que la puerta que abras sea de la habitación exacta a la que querías llegar, poniendo en tu camino a las criaturas más dóciles y guiándote con un camino dulce de flores de leche hacia él. Lamentablemente tus compañeros no corren con la misma suerte que tú.

🎭 Ex esposo Shadow Milk que te asusta con esa personalidad caótica y violenta, se te eriza la piel verlo tan desatado y fuera de juicio. Pero incluso con la corrupción carcomiéndole la poca sanidad que le queda, ¿qué clase de caballero sería si hace llorar una vez más a su linda esposa?

🎭 Ex esposo Shadow Milk que te toma de la mano suavemente y se pone de rodillas para besarte los nudillos en señal de sumisión y lealtad hacia ti. La luz de la permanente luna hace a su cabello brillar, casi como en aquella época de opulencia donde solía ser un dios sabio y benevolente.

🎭 Ex esposo Shadow Milk que aún te ama y el mero hecho de tocar tu piel después de eones lo hace temblar y su cabello se derrite. Los ojos que forman el todo en su interior están fijos en ti, babea y puedes ver colmillos afilados a través de su respiración agitada.

🎭 Ex esposo Shadow Milk que se acerca a ti y te susurra cuanto ha pensado en ti desde que las brujas los separaron, cuanto te ha anhelado y lo feliz que está de volver a tenerte cerca. Que te endulza el odio con palabras suaves y frases atrevidas mientras te das el lujo de estar de pie al lado de la bestia del engaño y no solo salir viva. Sino; ser objeto de todo su afecto.

🎭 Ex esposo Shadow Milk que sabe que te gusta lo que ves. Su vestimenta y actitud más atrevida, más encantador, más poderoso, más dominante, MEJOR que ese mojigato que solía ser en el pasado. Que te hace saber cuanto te desea, cuánto poder tienes sobre él y no le da miedo demostrar el desenfreno y pasión con la que te ve.

🎭 Ex esposo Shadow Milk que renueva sus votos matrimoniales y te hace el amor bajo el eterno cielo estrellado, en la habitación más alta de la torre del conocimiento engaño. Que aunque sabe que seguir amándose les traerá a ambos la más grande de las amarguras, no puede evitar repetir una y otra vez “te amo, te amo, te amo”.

🎭 Ex esposo Shadow Milk que te toma lento para no asustarte y te abraza para asegurarse de que estás ahí con él y no eres solo otra de sus alucinaciones. Que sabe que No estás acostumbrado a sus formas bruscas y su tacto áspero, así que te acostumbra y te muele a su gusto.

🎭 Ex esposo Shadow Milk que no puede evitar perder el control un poco a mitad de camino. Siendo perseguido por eones de no tenerte, de no sentirte. Te araña, te muerde el cuello, te chupa, te azota el culo y te sostiene con sus cuerdas para que tomes todo de él y él se lleve todo de ti. Corriéndose una y otra vez dentro de ti, lamentando que de su cuerpo divino no había forma de engendrar vida. Así que, cuando finaliza el espectáculo con ambos corriéndose juntos en armonía, las lágrimas se le escaparon y se dejó caer sobre ti como una marioneta sin vida.

🎭 Esposo Shadow Milk que en el momento en que vuelve a poner un lindo anillo de oro y gemas azules en tu dedo su dominio comienza a cambiar en una amalgama de ambas almas unidas. PV observa con horror desde abajo como el dominio de la bestia te absorbe y tú lo devoras en su lugar. El cielo de las ruinas de lo que antes era el reino que gobernabas con él: se ilumina. Y cada criatura dentro de la torre del engaño se arrodilla y es obligado a arrodillarse.

🎭 Esposo Shadow Milk que aparece ante PV y los demás flotando contigo entre sus brazos con una enorme sonrisa burlona. Ahora que Puro Vainilla te observa en tu máximo esplendor, simplemente se rinde. Estabas hecha a la medida para Shadow Milk, toda tu forma, tus gentiles manos, rasgos impíos y cabello suave; todo para alguien que no es él.

OKAY SOOO- UH- THIS IS MY NEWEST ART?? NOT THE BEST ANDDD NOT THE WORST! Also! This is my first post here(no shit). (I'm here because of my friend @s0m3b0dy-u-kn0w. This demon.)

ANYWAY! I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT ELSE TO SAY 😽

ɪᴛ'ꜱ ᴀ ᴘʀᴏᴍɪꜱᴇ · ɴɪᴋᴏʟᴀɪ ɢᴏɢᴏʟ ༉‧₊˚

content. f!reader. fluff-ish, (hilarious) threats of physical violence, flower metaphors, love at first philosophical debate, flower shops, nikolai treats reader like a puppy. might turn into a second oneshot. not proofread.

author's note. i'm back .ᐟ and surprisingly with a little nikolai. i've been working through some extreme writer's block, but i actually really like how this turned out. it's my first time tackling nikolai's character like this, so hopefully it's good .ᐟ

would you like to see more? fill out the updated taglist or comment here!

He never knew where he would end up whenever he had free time. A mall, a park, a zoo—didn’t matter too much to him. Nikolai bounded in-and-out of these places, delighted by the varied expressions of his unsuspecting victims, whether they were the tail-end of a harmless prank or something far worse.

An unlocatable humming accompanied the orchestra of fans that kept the space cool, and the bountiful stock almost made his jaw drop. The store was filled to the brim with luscious flowers that put the market stalls he had seen earlier to shame—sad that someone’s hard work was about to be wasted.

He pretended to be the average customer, humming the harmony to that distant voice as he perused the aisles, tearing leaves and plucking petals whenever he felt like it. It was a tranquil prologue to the sick pranks that formed in his mind.

He stopped at a cluster of daisies, which blossomed in various bright colors, allowing them to stand out between the exotic plants that flanked them. So, as predicted, he ripped a couple at the stem, chuckling to himself as they clumped onto the dirty store floor.

“Get the hell away from my daisies!”

Nikolai thrived in the unforeseen—though he certainly did not expect to be met with a trowel pressed dangerously close to his jugular, nor did he expect the cute Chihuahua-like woman attached to his handle. If this was his demise, he couldn’t say he’d mind. 

“What the hell is wrong with you?” She snatched the flowers from his reach, cradling the pot like an infant as her voice sweetened. “I’m sorry the mean man hurt you.”

“You’re like a little puppy! How adorable!” Her snarl did not help her case. “I’ve heard about people talking to plants, but you take it to a whole nother level, lady.”

“You didn’t answer my question. Why did you do that?”

“That wasn’t your question, though.” The glint in her eyes could melt icebergs, so he decided to cut his losses before she committed second-degree murder and mashed him into fertilizer. “But I’ll answer both, don’t worry! For the first, there’s nothing wrong with me. I’m completely sane!”

“Sane people don’t have to say they’re sane,” she retorted as she hooked the tool onto her belt.

“That’s where you’re wrong.” He turned to a patch of lovely black irises, their ribboning petals outstretched under sunshine that threatened to shrivel them, but they remained firm. His thumb brushed against their surfaces, careful not to tear one off while under a similarly threatening gaze.

“Rationality dies at the hands of complacency, like those so-called witches in Europe.” She eyed his hand when he removed his glove, contemplative as he cradled the flowers with a care she hadn’t seen. “We’re gifted with knowledge of the past—those accusers had to be fanatical or greedy. Possibly both! And because everyone else was so comfortable being complacent, rationality died, and those who opposed them were sent to the gallows.”

“In the end, those considered sane are no better than anyone else.” His one unconcealed eye struck her, overflowing with complexity veiled behind a villainous facade. She took to his words with a familiar hum, allowing Nikolai to look closer at her. He had to assume she owned this quaint little store; if her protective nature didn’t clue him in, the several layers of dirt stains on her overalls did. His eye trailed upward, lingering on her lips, which were pursued in contemplation. It made his heart leap—it would be so exciting to have such a reactive test subject.

“You’re right,” she sighed, then hit him with a pointed look, telling him she had noticed him eyeing her. “But what does that have to do with destroying my flowers?”

“Ah, yes!” He exclaimed. “Your second question. The answer to that one is simple. I did it because I can!”

She stared at him, bewildered, as he switched from the tone of a prankster to a monster, like a predator who bared its claws at unsuspecting, idiotic prey. But instead of running tail, she took a deep breath—she was obviously about to scream. That was okay with him, though he was admittedly disappointed at the idea of such a predictable reaction.

“I would usually say just because you can do something doesn’t mean you should, but I have a feeling you already know that.” So she wasn’t screaming. She was more composed than ever, not angry or upset—her eyes were so focused, and he felt himself drawn in. “But I’m confused. Why are you doing something bad simply because you can?”

He raised a brow. The answer was obvious, but a part of his mind felt that her question was only surface level. “What do you mean?”

“You’ve appointed yourself as someone who stands against society, correct?” she prodded, her fingers absentmindedly circling the rim of a pot to push the dirt inside. 

He assisted her, albeit poorly, as he overfilled some pots. “Correct! It’s what I do.”

She paused. “If you’re going against society, then doesn’t that mean you’re adapting your behavior around society?”

He stopped, frowning.

“You’ve claimed that you're above society, but what you’re actually doing is acting parallel to it. You’re not doing things because you can. You’re doing them because someone told you not to.”

Nikolai swallowed hard, trying to focus on her hand as she took it out of her glove to brush back her hair. “Society needs someone to play the monster. You’re right—the complacent are no better just because they fall in line—but that doesn’t mean your actions are effective. You’ve just fallen into the opposing line of thinking.”

He couldn’t find the will to look at her anymore. This strange Chihuahua-like woman, in only a couple of sentences, unraveled his entire purpose. His connection with Fyodor no longer felt personal—had he always been that easy to read? A part of him wanted to pretend he had never heard her words, to walk out the door and pretend she never existed. Nothing was stopping him, so why didn’t he? When he met her eyes, he remained speechless.

“I-I majored in philosophy in college,” she stammered, her hands returning to her plants as she sunk under the conversation’s sudden weight.

“...I underestimated you.”

His every action had been to spite society, but was that any better than conforming to it? He was no closer to freedom; his strings remained intact due to ignorance. Was that why Fyodor only acknowledged him for a moment before filing him away as another “fantastic” person he had met on his journeys? He slipped from his glove, prickling his finger on a leaf. He thought that someone understanding him was enough.

But no. He wanted, no—he needed someone to oppose him. Transformation requires a catalyst. He thought he could bring about change by himself, but someone equal and opposite to him—they would be his catalyst.

“You’re easier to read than you think,” she said, breaking through his thoughts. “It’s just that most people would rather stick with their shallow, first perception than dig any deeper. It’s how the world keeps spinning.”

Before he could find the words to implore her to speak, to tell him about anything and everything, the sound of a bell cut through the air. 

“Good afternoon, (Name)!” an older woman exclaimed, eyeing Nikolai before she glanced at the aforementioned—at (Name).

“Good afternoon, Yamaguchi-san. I’ll be with you in just a moment.”

His hands fiddled with his overcoat. “Your name is (Name)?”

“It is.” He stifled his smile at her unamused expression, almost a pout. “What’s yours?”

“Hmm, not telling!” He poked her nose. “You’ll have to earn that when we meet again. Toodle-loo!”

But she caught him by the hand before he could exit in a grand spin. Her hand was warm, with a warmth that threatened to thaw at his frozen heart. “Hey! You’ll have to promise you won’t mess with any more of my plants. Got that?”

He should’ve said no; he should’ve said no and left. It had to be how she held out her pinkie or the twitch of her brow. He intertwined their fingers without a second thought, bringing the tip of hers to his lips as he delighted in her yelp. Another connection. Another string to tie him down. 

But this one would be okay.

“It’s a promise.”

ᴛᴀɢʟɪꜱᴛ: @ruru-kiss @miloofc @fyorina @ishqani @zyilas @lovesick-fairy @squigglewigglewoo @kelperspelt @thesilvernight0wl @s1eepybunny @lovedazai @dazaisms @deepseafragments @osameowdazai @himikoslove @little-miss-chaoss @mxxny-lupin @justcallmesakira @chyozai @yonseibananamilk @suru1990 @honeymoon38 @saeandscaralover

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Today's Sigma is: praising(?) nikolai

cage of the soul