Osamu Dazai - Blog Posts

Waiting

got lazy to do a proper background :p

Eyes

That meursault scene, very beautiful

Little sketches I did recently :)

Driver's License

Something Dazai will probably never get

Art block

I wanted to draw another chibi Dazai, it turned out less Chibi-like than I expected

Beast Dazai

Bedtime

Circle. Circle. Dot. Dot.

Random school doodle in class :p

Phone

Cold Water

That one interaction between Dazai and Atsushi

School doodle :D

Underwater

Control

Haven’t finished any art this month so more wips and doodles :))

15 Dazai and Chuuya chibis from an assignment :))

Happy Birthday to Dazai! :))

i thought dazai started balding.

Gakuen bsd illustration for AGF2023

sorry guys i eated him

Can't go wrong with burgerzai. Old art upload, I still cherish this one everyday

See how happy Oda's birthday is?

Art trade with @yebyyhfushi !!! 💥💥💥

Big scary orca is about to eat that cute chubby seal.....

Recently I’ve been going back through BSD to do some analysis and I was thinking about Atsushi as the tiger, and what the tiger symbolizes.

I think the tiger is a good allegory for Atsushi’s views on himself as a person. And hear me out:

At the start of the story, Atsushi fears the tiger, but he also seems to hold some spite towards it due to it being the cause of him getting kicked out of the orphanage.

But then we learn that Atsushi is the tiger, and Atsushi himself feels terrible about it. There is suddenly no separation between himself and the tiger in his mind. They are one and the same, and he is just as responsible for everything as the tiger is. He hates the tiger, he doesn’t trust it, and he doesn’t understand it.

And he is the tiger.

It’s kinda common knowledge that Atsushi hates himself, nor does he trust himself, and that is reflected in the fact that the tiger is shown to be an uncontrollable, bloodthirsty creature. It does nothing good for anyone; just as Atsushi thinks he himself does nothing good or useful for anyone.

I’d also like to mention the fact that during chapter/episode one (1), when Atsushi is revealed as the tiger, Dazai is the one to stop it with his ability, and I think that’s an excellent little nod to how it is through Dazai (and by extension the rest of the ADA) that Atsushi is able to begin to trust himself more, and have more value in himself as a person.

Of course later on, Atsushi does make peace with the tiger, and it’s such a powerful moment because it’s not just Atsushi reconciling with the tiger, it’s Atsushi reconciling with himself as well. And I think it shows his growth as a character just fantastically.

I’m open to hearing the thoughts of others as well of course :]

This ^^^

I have seen so many people misconstrue this part of Atsushi’s journey and not quite grasp this scene for what it really is. It’s great to see someone break it down a bit.

i want to talk about the moment that both made me fall in love with atsushi nakajima as a character, and which made me realize that I was probably going to get obsessed with BSD.

specifically, it was this moment.

words can not describe how important this moment was to me, and how vital this is to both atsushi as a character and his relationship with dazai as a whole.

as someone who is currently living with my abusive parents, this was something that resonated with me a lot — oftentimes, media when attempting to portray abuse (specifically parental abuse) and victims of abuse, does 1 out of 2 things:

1. Tries to justify the abuse and protect the parents — having the kids be okay with the treatment they recieved.

2. Has the kids utterly despise their parents with no shred of good feelings.

And whilst, sure, both of these can happen — and I'm sure there are victims who actually feel like this — it's not the most common response.

Speaking from my own experience — I don't know how to feel about my parents. If they died, I wouldn't know what face to make. I hate them more than anyone else, but at the same time, I grew up with them. I hate them, but I also love them. If they died, I don't know how I'd feel about it. And we get to see Atsushi having that exact breakdown — the elation over the person you hate dying, versus the grief and frustration and confusion. Abuse isn't simple, and feelings aren't simply — your abuser dying isn't something that's clean cut, it comes with a million different conflicting confusing emotions.

And the fact that Atsushi is allowed to have these feelings, is allowed to hate the headmaster, is allowed to grieve without forgiveness, is so important. BSD doesn't try to justify his abuse — it's okay to mourn someone that hurt you even if you don't like them. Their death — or their intentions — don't make forgiveness a necessity.

And even moreso, the fact that he gets explicitly told that regardless of the fact that that abuse was what molded him into the person he is today and has helped him survive, and the fact that the headmaster had good intentions, it was bad and unforgivable, is extremely important.

dazai not forcing atsushi to feel a certain way about his abuser, and encouraging him to mourn without forgiveness and to actually feel, is an incredibly important moment — i doubt that i'm only speaking for myself here when i say that when dealing with these subject matters, these are the types of things we'd like to hear.

the fact that dazai is the character telling atsushi this isn't lost on me, either — considering that earlier on this chapter, he sent ryuunosuke to tell atsushi about the headmaster, and they had this interaction:

everything about this is so fascinating and well written — from atsushi having an extremely realistic breakdown over the death of his abuser, to dazai telling him that he has zero obligation for forgiveness — and the implications that he's aware that what he's done to ryuunosuke is wrong regardless of intentions, is fascinating.

to me, atsushi nakajima has always felt human in a way most protagonists don't — his trauma impacts him, he has complex messy feelings that can't be easily resolved. it's his choice what to do with his emotions, and all others can do is give advice, and let him figure out how to deal with them.

atsushi nakajima crying over the man who simultaneously raised him and made his life a living hell is accurate in a way that almost hurts.

(slightly unrelated, but i sure was accurate with this prediction from a month ago, huh!)

And then he tumbled to the floor....hehe

Yeah, so fast sketch

Please oh great citizens of tumblr.com, bestow upon me your BSD headcanons

This is an emergency actually

Thinking about how Soukoku’s physical intimacy must have played out over the years.

Soukoku at 15, two teenagers who have hardly felt a gentle touch in their lives. Both unknowing how to initiate things, and at first making up for the touch starvation by picking fights with one another. A punch becomes more reassuring then a gentle hand ever could.

But slowly, the lines stop mattering. Touches linger, distance shortens, and physical closeness becomes more grounding than aggression ever had.

By the time they are 17, they have no concept of a line. They are close freely, albeit in unconventional ways: literally butting heads, practically lounging on top of each other on couches and beds, and helping one another with first aid.

The relationship they have confuses those around them, but for the two of them, labels never mattered. They are simply partners. Two forces that work in tandem.

Following the Dragon’s Head Conflict, they begin to drift. Then when Dazai leaves, it all ends.

There are no more quiet moments of just basking in each other’s presence. No more lingering touches. Not even any more fighting.

I wish I could say that when they work together again at 22 years old, they resume everything like they used to, but I think it takes more time for them to fall back into things again.

By that point their relationship is completely different; they’d have to find new ways to navigate things.

But I think they could get there eventually.

The ADA’s driving situation is so funny to me when I think about it, like-

Dazai is such a bad driver him even being near the car greatly increases your chances of crashing.

Atushi can’t drive for shit because he was stuck in the orphanage until he was 18.

Ranpo doesn’t even know how to ride a damn train and is so bad at navigating I can’t tell if he’s bullshitting or not.

Kenji probably didn’t even know what a car was until he joined the Agency.

Kunikida can maybe drive but he’s probably going way too fast at any given time regardless of the situation.

I don’t even want to think about what would happen if you put one of the Tanizaki siblings behind the wheel, especially if they were both in the car at the same time.

Have you ever seen Fukuzawa in the same room as a car?

And Yosano is yet to be determined.

So that leaves Kyouka. The 14 year old child as the Agency’s main driver when something comes up. And even she’s kinda reckless.

Chuuya made Dazai want to live.

Oda made Dazai want to change.