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I want a relationship that is completely undefinable by any existing labels or words. Like, we're so close and we hug and kiss each other's foreheads and cuddle and travel and explore together, and we get along so well and have so much in common. But at the same time, our relationship isn't fully romantic or fully platonic; it's a completely separate, open-to-interpretation thing that we tweaked as needed, and we have our own boundaries and things we are and aren't comfortable with, and we respect each other in every way, shape, and form.
Am I the only aro-spec person who switches between wanting a committed partnership, be it romantic, platonic, queerplatonic, etc, and wanting to be as far away from relationships as possible?
Was I the only aro-spec person who had the experience of thinking that I had crushes growing up, but looking back, they might not have been crushes because 1. I could never or only rarely name any traits that I liked about them (and those rare times that I could were traits that I simply admired), 2. I felt immense relief when they rejected me, or 3. I just wanted to have a crush, so I chose a person and consciously decided to develop feelings for them, not knowing that it doesn't work like that?
Something I recently realized that helped me understand my aro-spec identity is that my "crushes" that I can remember weren't actually fueled by romantic attraction for the person. They were actually fueled by attraction towards the idea of dating/liking them, but not actually them as a person. I wanted to find my soulmate and as soon as I found someone that I thought fit that ideal, I would start daydreaming about being with them, but I wasn't really attracted to them as a person, just my idealized version of them and the relationship. As a result, I couldn't really name any traits about those people that I liked, aside from surface level ones like, "funny," "nice," and "hardworking." And while I was aesthetically attracted to them, I never really fantasized about kissing them or being super romantic with them (aside from maybe hand-holding or hugging), and if I ever tried, it made me uncomfortable and felt like I was violating them. Did anyone else have a similar experience or is it just me?
Did any other aroace-spec people try to write fanfiction when they were younger, but struggled to write romance/romantic scenes? Because I vividly remember trying to write fanfiction when I was younger, but not really knowing how to write the romance because that wasn't something that I felt that much. And this goes for all kinds of romantic fanfic, reader insert, OC insert, shipping, etc. I tried writing all of the above, and every single time, I was unable to write, or even sometimes start, the romantic scenes, because I just didn't know what exactly that felt like or how romantic relationships started. And even when I could get through writing fanfic, it just felt SO unnatural and weird to actually write; like not bad, but just odd, like not realistic. But somehow, people really liked it, so I guess I did something right lol
Idk if I'm the only aro-spec person who is like this, but I need to talk about it bc it's been on my mind so much lol
So, like...in general, I have a complicated relationship with romance. In fiction (books/movies/tv/fanfic), I only really like queer romance. Two guys? All for it! Two girls? All for it! NB person with someone else? All for it! Granted, there will always be exceptions and romance stories that I prefer more than others, but by large, I tend to enjoy most queer romance stories that I consume. HOWEVER, for some strange reason, when it comes to straight romance stories, I almost always get squicked out or uncomfortable!! AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHYYYY!!! Like, it could be nearly identical to a queer romance story, but I would still be uncomfy if it was heterosexual, and I don't know why!!!!!!
When it comes to irl romance, I'm usually either indifferent or uncomfortable with it, no matter if it's queer or straight. Like, I can usually handle it, unless they're full on like making out or smth, then obviously, I'm extremely uncomfy and averse, but if it's casual, then it's just whatever.
But, honestly, I don't know what my deal is with the fictional romance!! I've even forced myself to like some straight romance in the past, but it's always SO forced.
So, yeah, that's how I feel. Can anyone else relate, or is it just me??
I WANT A QPR SOOOOOO BADDDDD!!
I want someone that I can call my partner, but not necessarily in a romantic way. I want someone to hug and be close to. I want someone who I can listen to and who can listen to me. I want someone who shares my interests. I want someone that will agree to discuss and respect our boundaries with one another. I want someone who I can just be with, like we can just exist together. I want someone who will go book shopping with me and just listen to me gush about different books. I want someone who will walk down the halls with, and maybe we'll hold hands and maybe we won't. I want someone who will always be ready to comfort me and who I can comfort whenever they need it. I want someone who will help me calm down and think through things carefully. I want someone who I can explore and go on adventures with.
Basically, I just really want a queerplatonic partner/relationship.
Same!! What would hook me in was the elaborate plots and character backstories, not so much the romance. Like, for example, I read a lot of MHA reader insert and OC fanfic, and what I really liked was how creative the OC/reader's backstories would be, or how they would contribute to the storyline throughout the fic, not so much the romance elements; in fact, they were kind of annoying at times.
Edit: in fact, I would write fanfic myself, but what I focused on and enjoyed most was coming up with unique backstories, quirks, character dynamics, and subplots for the OC/reader. And, when it came to writing the romance, I had no idea how to make it believeable, or even how to write it in the first place.
Am I the only aroace-spec person who read a lot of fanfic when I was younger, but instead of inserting myself into the reader insert stories, I would just insert one of my characters or a random OC that was similar to me but not the same, bc it felt weird to put myself into those situations?
Or was that just me?
Am I the only aroace-spec person who read a lot of fanfic when I was younger, but instead of inserting myself into the reader insert stories, I would just insert one of my characters or a random OC that was similar to me but not the same, bc it felt weird to put myself into those situations?
Or was that just me?
All Our Hidden Gifts by Caroline O'Donoghue! I had never heard of it when I picked it up from B&N, but I ended up loving it and reading the whole series! To this day, it's still one of my favs
As a person who is dying for book recommendations: What is a book you picked up randomly that you heard nothing about previously that blew you away?
I feel like we all have at least one hidden gem we stumbled upon.
Please reblog with your books in the tags :)
no because it was so fucking funny watching everyone flip their shit over what abrosexual means. meanwhile I’m over here smirking to myself knowing how goated I am at this and how they’re all noobs compared to me. I’m superior.
when they went over neptunic, sapphic, uranic etc they were all like “WHY ARE THEY NAMED AFTER PLANETS???”
even my teacher was reading the definition on the website, and then explaining it completely wrong. “A is attracted to feminine men, so she likes B because he is a boy but FEELS like a girl” “I am a woman but I feel like a boy, and then I use medication, operations etc THEN I am transgender”
they a lil confused but they got the spirit
did my school just
talk about queer identities BEFORE pride month
did my school just
talk about queer identities BEFORE pride month
REPOST AND PLEASE HELP
https://www.gofundme.com/f/queer-black-immigrant-trying-to-move-out?utm_source=customer&utm_medium=copy_link&utm_campaign=p_cf+share-flow-1
!!PLEASE READ AND SHARE IF YOURE UNABLE TO DONATE!!!
When I say I like your chipped black nails I’m not saying saying how good they look I’m appreciating the gayness of it
Subtle Pride Flag Masterpost
All my subtle pride flags so far compiled into one post.
Lesbian
Gay
Bisexual
Pansexual
Transgender
Non-Binary
Genderfluid
Demisexual
Aromantic
Asexual
AroAce
Progress
Remastered, better quality versions now available.
In regards of the Trump government scraping all trans inclusion in its queer information portion of its websites I have made this thing. Spread the word. Don't let them pretend we never existed.
P.S: Don't like! Reblog! <3
𝐍𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐇𝐚𝐰𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐬 // 𝐄𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐞 𝐌𝐮𝐧𝐬𝐨𝐧
𝘌𝘥𝘥𝘪𝘦 𝘔𝘶𝘯𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘹 𝘔𝘢𝘭𝘦 𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳
It was a late Saturday night, your parents were out of town so you decided to invite the dungeon master; Eddie Munson, to your house. You've known him since middle school and have been friends ever since.
Your plan was to binge horror films and help Ed brainstorm some ideas for the next campaign. You weren't in his club but on rare occuasion, he would come to you to try and rope you in.
The door bell echoed through the halls, you rushed to the door and opened it to see Eddie with his unruly hair and hellfire shirt.
"Conners, what's up?" He pulled you in for a hug.
"I've been waiting for hours!" You complained.
"Sorry, got held up with the others!"
You both entered the house and brought him down to the basement, "Whatcha wanna watch? Nightmare on elm Street, Halloween, The Shining-"
"Let's try Halloween." He sits back on the couch.
You put the tape in and began to played it loud and clear. The movie started up, and you already started making your unnecessary comments.
"What kind of dumbass- JEEZ!!" You cringed at the sex scene; these movies never really scared you, only THOSE scenes did..
"Are you okay? We can turn it off if it makes you uncomfortable." You felt comfort through his words.
You turned it off and just stared off into space. However you looked back up to see Ed staring at you.
"Dude, you're so handsome-" He blurted out of nowhere, you both bursted into laughter.
"I'm honored to hear that from the one and only Eddie Munson." You liked hearing his name over and over again, it gave you a warm feeling.
You both started to watch nightmare on elm Street but you were so focused on the guy across from you. So you decided to take your shot.
"What if we made out?" You awkwardly asked, realizing you probably screwed that up.
"Really?" He asked.
You scooted closer and he put his hands behind your head. You connected your lips and you slowly went deeper. You loved this goofy ass man with all of your heart.
You heard a door upstairs swing open and heard footsteps stomping around.
He broke the kiss and ran for the window, "See you at school," he winked, squeezing his way through it. You watched as he ran for his car.
You listened to your parents walk down the stairs, "We're back."
Your dad grumbled, "There weren't any girls over, right?"
"Just me, sir." You chuckled as he slammed the door to the basement. They would never know..
I love having a friend I can just talk to about anything. I never really talked about the things I liked as a middle schooler because I was that one gay kid obsessed with anime and Minecraft and all that other shit but in a Christian community. But a little over a year ago, I met a person equally as gay and obsessed with anime as I am, and I love them. So much. I actually get excited about talking to them because they will listen no matter what. They know more about me than my parents and best friend of 6 years. Like holy shit. I want to forever be their friend and talk to them and rant and all of that.
The best part is, I get to listen to them. I get to hear about their interests, what music artist they're currently obsessed with, that one character from that game that they can't stop thinking about, and what book they're reading. I get to bond with them. And I love it. I love having a friend I can talk to about anything, and also being the friend they talk to about anything. I hope everyone has a friend like this. :)
Sebastian and a closeted!male s/o
𝐒𝐄𝐁𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐀𝐍 𝐖/ 𝐀 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐒/𝐎
𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 : headcanons
𝐚/𝐧 : ask and you shall receive! hope you enjoy anon! :)
𖤐 | Sebastian, quite frankly, could care less about what your sexuality is. A soul is a soul, and he happens to find yours reasonably pleasant. In his eyes, competence is what matters most. You were certainly more emotionally intelligent than your peers if you were able to decipher such an important part of yourself on your own. Better yet, to have the bravery to speak to him about such a matter.
𖤐 | He notices quite quickly of your tendencies. As a demon, he is rather observant of his surroundings so he can properly dispatch enemies for his master and perform at his top ability. Hence, he takes notice of your secretive nature when it came to your preferences. One instance was when you were gossiping with Mey-Rin when the conversation led to some “girl talk”, in other words discussing marriage, kids, and other topics that were answered with complicated responses. Your friend, of course, meant well with her whole heart, but the demon pulled you away after noticing you were becoming rather uncomfortable. Especially during the eighteen hundreds, being queer was looked down upon, so he understood your adamance on hiding who you were attracted to. Though, as stated before, he could care less about that.
𖤐 | He would drop a few hints that he is aware of your predicament, solely for his own amusement. A few jokes might be shared between the two of you, leaving you angrily frowning at him as he tries to remain composed. Or, he might randomly drop the knowledge that he knows how you are feeling then quickly run off to tend to his other duties. He likes to keep you guessing.
𖤐 | If he ever meets your family or friends, then he of course will not tell a soul about your predicament if you so wish. He will acknowledge the nervous twitches of your fingers, the careful thought that goes into your next words, your uneven breathing; there is little to nothing that he does not notice about how you interact with your family or friends. Being closeted about who you are may not necessarily be about how nice and supportive your loved ones are, or about how cruel they are; it might simply come from anxiety, a very natural feeling to have. No matter what the cause is, Sebastian will do his best to understand and support you, in his own way.
@𝐩𝐡𝐪𝐧𝐭𝐨𝐦𝐡𝐢𝐯𝐞 — ˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚ - please do not translate or plagiarize my works.
“I just want to be in love with a boy the way boys like boys and in love with a girl the way girls like girls but instead I’m here. Bitchless.”
Hey peoples. I was talking with my friends about our coffee abominations and I want to hear y'all's. Here's my friend's:
Instant Beaumont medium roast coffee,
An Irish creamer from Aldi, they can't remember the name,
Swiss mix hot chocolate powder.
Here's mine:
A cup of folgers coffee,
All the coffee monsters,
Half of each the cold vanilla and mocha Starbucks drinks you can get at gas stations,
And 2 shots of Coffee Mate French Vanilla zero sugar.
Give me your coffee abominations so I can have a quick death hehe... For legal reasons that is a joke, but do give me your abominations please!