Slow Burn - Blog Posts

Guys...Is still having an AO3 bookmark in your library despite it obviously saying that's it's been discontinued a red flag..?

Merry Christmas everyone and happy end of 2024! Good father in heaven help me this year has been a lot… but for now I’d like to share with you all a gift that I wrote for one of the best friends I could have hoped to make this year and in this new fandom: Transformers War Chronicles. Please check out her content on both instagram and YouTube as she is seriously so overwhelmingly talented! She loved this gift and insisted I share it with the world. So, without further ado, I hope you all enjoy this little geeky gift from me to you! Happy Holidays and God Bless!

“Mistletoes’ meaning” An Opilita Christmas fic Inspired by Transformers War Chronicles! Merry Christmas Bestie!!! Written By CJ The Fox

“Finally…” Elita groaned practically slumping through the door as Optimus held it open for her. “Thanks…” she sighed pulling together enough strength to smile up at him. He smiled back though not able to hide the exhaustion in his eyes any better than she could have. He slid the wooden door closed behind them before sweeping a bit of the fallen snow off his shoulders and arms. He glanced back at Elita who immediately flashed a look that paused his hand in the air beside her. “Fine…” she relented quietly, aggressive smirk fading into a soft smile and head tilting to the side, plumes of the snow to falling off and onto the ground. The faintest blue glow flushed against her cheeks as she quirked her eyebrow up at him. Internally, she fought to decide if she should avoid eye contact or maintain it harder. They both knew if he’d brought it up, she would try to blame it on the cold. They had just come inside after all! Oh, she would try~ They also both knew even with his battle mask still pulled up above his sinuses Optimus was no doubt giving her a delighted scrap eating grin beneath it. She huffed, smile still on her face as she jabbed him in the stomach with her elbow. The two chuckled quietly together as he finished brushing the last little bits of snow off the top of helmet. His digits slid down the side of her helm just a bit to hold her chin up between his fingers. Elita gulped at his touch the glow of her face brightening ever further as he looked at her. Seemingly satisfied, eyes still alight with his hidden and certainly smugger smile, he slid his fingertips back up the side of her helm brushing the last bit of snow off her glowing cheek.

“The erm… The festival hall truly is something special…” He pondered aloud glancing to the side at the room they now stood in. Elita followed his gaze falling into silent agreement. It wasn’t any of the meeting halls of Cybertron. Hell, it wasn’t even one of the castles these humans had, but she couldn’t deny…they’d definitely put in some work for their guests. According to Optimus or at the very least what he said the officers had told him; this had been a bomb shelter that had been refurbished into a deluxe garage. What was once an obscure base in the middle of nowhere had become where farm equipment, racing and show horses and military balls would be held. The building had been decorated for just such an occasion and then some. Despite the minimal to nonexistent furniture, the room had a removable wooden floor placed covered in faded footprints of occasions come and gone. On both sides of the building were thick panel windows showing the regrowing storm outside. Since they were still bulletproof, the howls of the wind instead became whispering ambience against the swirly sky outside. Finally, there were the lights, hundreds of thousands of twinkling white bulbs wrapped around the cornering support beams and wooden roofing. Alongside more lights, a stone fireplace had been hollowed out in the final thicker support beam at the center of the room, glowing with the warm blaze crackling inside.

“I’m not sure if you bots need beds or anything but uhhhh here…” Optimus had remembered the building director saying as he’d showed him the giant gymnastic pads laid out in front of the fire. It was no recharge slab, but the thought was considerate. And sure, there was enough room for them to have their own mats to themselves… Optimus glanced back at Elita as she still slowly spun staring at the humble yet festive display surrounding them. Maybe it was that the snow had melted, making an already glistening paint job that much more reflective. Maybe it was that the humans had truly outdone themselves with the decorating for a place intended for mere safety. Maybe it was that it was just the two of them. Maybe… Maybe it was just her. As if in a trance he took slow yet purposeful steps toward her. The beams danced across her figure, like the fireflies they had seen in the summers on this strange new planet. Or the neon ribbons that decorated buildings almost matching Iacon’s own advertising. The shimmer seemed to accentuate all of the strength and beauty that made Elita well… Elita. From the scars and scrapes to the way she carried herself with the authority of a leader alongside the wonder of seeing this world for the very first time to the gentle elegance of what it meant to be a femme. She smiled again up at him before he even realized he had crossed the room over to her. She returned her optics to the wooden rafters now covered with glittering beams and fake yet lush foliage. Her expression and physique together were giving the glow of the fire and even Op’s own spark some serious competition. Yeah… separate mats… like that was gonna happen.

“Alright I’ll admit it. This is pretty nice…” She smirked crossing her arms and tilting her hips to the side. Optimus closed the rest of the gap between them, placing a hand on her shoulder as she shifted her weight onto her other hip against him. She leaned her head into the side of his chest plate, closing her optics for a moment before looking up at him then passed him. “It’s… Beautiful…” She sighed as if admitting defeat to the beauty of their building. Optimus leaned back warm eyes ever present, sliding his hand across her back before letting it drape across the other shoulder, thumb gently rubbing where her shoulder met her chest. “Huh… What’s that?” Elita piped, suddenly pulling away from Optimus yet also grabbing him by the hand.

“Hm?” Optimus blinked trying to process her having been so close, pressed up against him to suddenly pull him to the middle of the room optics still on the ceiling.

“That! Right there That plant’s different from the others. Is it supposed to be there? Or is it a ‘weed’ as humans call it? Or is the plant just blooming?” While still slightly confused, Optimus followed her fingertip, sure enough on one of the rafters, the false foliage had come to a stop to leave a small section of bare wood. Tied on the bark was what appeared to be a small upside-down bush with white berries or seeds sprouting in the leaves. The base had been tied with a shiny red bow that looped up around the wood plank as if turning it into a present.

“Oh!” Optimus blinked again in recollection; he had seen this plant before as well had its meaning explained to him. “O-oh…” He repeated, needing to clear his throat a bit.

“What?” Elita perked up at him. “What is it?” I can cut it out if it’s invading the other plant life. Or does the whole bush need to be disposed of?” Without skipping a beat, she pulled her laser pistol from her hip and aimed it at the foreign fauna as it hummed to life.

“Ah! No no! No no no!” Optimus half yelped half laughed reaching up to stop her weapon. “Th-That won’t be necessary my dear!” Besides it wasn’t exactly like they needed to test the durability of this place from the inside. Even if they were still learning about how earth worked, shooting a hole in the ceiling didn’t seem like the most polite thing to do… “There’s nothing wrong I can assure you!” He spoke as calmly and cheerfully as he could manage, nervousness not quite hidden from his voice.

“Oh ok.” Elita shrugged nonchalantly giving the gun a quick twirl in her hand before sliding it back into her holster. “So, what is it then?” “Well…” Optimus put a free hand behind his head nervously glancing at the floor. The building director had explained the meaning of this plant to him when he’d been shown where he and Elita could be staying to wait out the winter storm.

“Sorry sir, I think that was just left over from our usual holiday decoration set up. But we can take it down! I didn’t know if you and your uh… your friend there- Well, is she? Uh- sorry I shouldn’t have assumed-”

“Its fine.” Optimus had laughed, albeit a bit flustered at the topic, but shame was never an emotion that registered in his sensors. There was nothing to be ashamed of. He could NEVER be ashamed. Not of her. Not ever. “She… She is.”

“Oh thank, God…” The director heaved more to himself than to the massive living machine now harboring an entire event hall like a hotel. Ever since that conversation, a small part of Optimus both expected and hoped that she would find the spirited sprout on that ceiling just to have this very talk.

“It’s called a Mistletoe.” Optimus began. Sliding his palm and fingertips carefully down her arm until it once again connected with her hand. “Obviously it’s a type of plant here on this planet but the ones in here are all fake as to not extinguish any resources as well as save time on cleaning. I’ve done some research on the real blooms though!”

“Of course, you did...” Elita giggled, rolling her eyes ever so slightly as she leaned closer letting the backs of their arms slide and softly bump against one another in their swaying postures. “I wouldn’t have expected anything less from you book bot.” She could tell he grinned that typical yet classical geeky grin beneath his mask. Bashful yet not embarrassed of his knowledge nor the work he had put in to gain it. For that her respect renewed thought she would never admit it out loud… at least not right now… No matter how much of a fighter he had become deep down he would always be that shy archivist and student ready to learn and to cherish anything and everything he could see. “Heh…” So that was how she’d fallen for a geek…

“It can actually grow on common human foods such as the apple trees we saw on the way here!” He continued his voice carrying that usual professionalism he had acquired from leading teams but unable to mask the genuine excitement as he gestured with his free hand. “Or oak trees which as you already know provide them with portions of their atmosphere. You weren’t completely wrong in calling it ‘weed like’ though, as it is actually an invasive species.”

“Really?”

“Mhm!” He nodded. “It can actually cause a disease for the base plant leading to weakened sprouts, that need to be cut out or…” He pointed back to her holster. “What you had suggested. Though shotguns are typically the human’s choices for removal.”

“Well damn! I guess it’s a good thing they’re all plastic then, huh? Elita laughed bumping her hip against the side of his thigh before leaning completely against him. The back of her head was almost nuzzling his chest as she made herself comfortable, hand never leaving his.

“Indeed.” Optimus laughed as well though softer, almost politely as he lingered his gaze on her before returning it to the plant. “Yet despite that, it’s become a symbol on this planet. A signal of tradition.”

“Oh yeah? What of?” Elita mused, finally letting her weight fully against him and lifting their intertwined hands up to her shoulder. Op smiled closing his grasp and leaning a bit of his own weight atop her though cautious to not become too heavy.

“It’s meant to be a sign of… of connection, good will… or love.”

“O-Oh?” Elita stuttered suddenly. Optimus could feel her grip twitch in his own at the last word her entire body engaging in a split-second jolt against him. She tried to cover it up and act as if it hadn’t happened with that firm voice remark. Oh, she tried. He had to fight the urge to tease her, not wanting to risk ruining the moment or receiving one of her impressive right hooks in his arm. His smile practically peeking over the mask he kept going.

“And… when two people who just so happen to love one another… at least romantically…” Elita’s eyes widened. Yet another key word seemed to strike her like a blow, her face illuminating instantaneously. “…Stand beneath this plant, it is customary for them…to also… exchange a kiss.” Elita tensed in his grip her hand tightening slightly again, not quite a squeeze. It was the noticeable pressure and stiffness of her body locking in place.

“Huh…” It was all she could manage to get out and it was still a hoarse squeak. The attempt at nonchalance failed worse than one of StarScream’s leadership endeavors. He could feel the hum of her spark as it began to quicken its pace against his palm. She stared intently at the plant desperate to not look at him. Her eyes practically burned into it as much as her pistol would have, maybe even more so. It felt so obvious now… During the entire conversation she could feel his pulse rising too! Slower and calmer than hers, yes but still… She had just figured it was because he always showed that sweet excitement when sharing his knowledge with her. Or maybe it was because she had been enjoying it, like every time he did so. No... she should have seen this coming... She should… She looked up at him, just like at the door, it was a sight to behold. The lights sparkling around them tracing his every distinguished feature from the tips of his antenna to the base of that sharp jaw. Yet of course those lights could never compare to those eyes as they glistened in the gentle darkness. The humans were right, eyes truly were the windows to the soul or in their case, spark. Those eyes could tell his entire legacy without a single word in any language in any universe. They showed the exhaustion of maintaining so much and so many at once. The hours upon hours of research, reading and learning. The knowledge of so much good and bad in the galaxy. Secrets and truths that belonged to both of them and probably all of their loved ones too. Information that he would take to his grave if that’s what it took. The quiet sorrow of knowing too much and not knowing enough and seeming to wish for neither and both simultaneously. And despite all of it, the blue glow remained bright, just as it had when she had first met that geeky archivist all those cycles ago. It showed the intense focus it took to be quick thinking and deeply pondering. The curiosity of always being ready to learn something new and to share that knowledge with others. It showed wisdom gained from periods of lessons learned in easy and hard ways. It showed kindness, patience and composure, though there was clearly a silent joy gleaming beneath all that stupid stoicism. So powerful… eyes certainly belonging to someone with this level of strength. Not just the physical strength he had obtained over the years, not even the mental strength he had had before that, but the strength of his character. The strength of what it meant to be Optimus Prime. And yet his gaze was soft as if the massive hulking strength he possessed was merely an illusion as he gently rubbed his thumb along the top of her hand. She had almost forgotten she was holding it. Almost…

“Optimus?” She spoke before registering the words leaving her lips. Swallowing again almost as if wishing she hadn’t said anything. Her face showed all of the indecision and jumbled thoughts her mind was trying and failing to organize as her eyes itched to look away but didn’t. Optimus stared back at her; face as serene as ever. He tilted his head slightly to the side allowing his antenna to wiggle slightly at the movement as he waited for her to continue in the silence following his name. “Uh…Do you think that… that uh…” Her mouth hung slightly open with unspoken words before she swallowed the rest of the sentence. He quirked up an eyebrow at her before looking down to their hands as slowly grabbed the other one. Elita followed his gaze, trembling slightly as he intertwined the second set of digits between his own.

“Yes…” Optimus knelt onto one knee, his face now level with hers. He cupped both of her hands within his and pulled her slightly closer to him. Keeping her hands wrapped up snugly in his grasp, he raised his other arm to place it on her shoulder. “…Elita?” If she wasn’t at a loss for words before, she sure as hell was now. “Strong enough to be gentle” he had said once… In this moment, those words described him perfectly. His eyes overflowed with the most overwhelming yet soothing presence in the universe: Love. And that love, that presence that power, was directed at her. The glow of her face was making a mockery of the surrounding bulbs and flames. She could feel her Energon prickling behind her cheeks and spark pounding wildly in her chest as it echoed in her audials.

“A- ahh… Uhm…” Her failing words were going to give Starscream competition at this rate.

“Are you alright?” His brow furrowed eyes glinting in concern, He leaned in pulling her almost completely to his chest as he placed his hand holding hers just above his spark. Elita shivered at the touch of him tracing his thumb up the side of her neck to cup the side of her face in his palm needing to bite her lip and squeeze her optics shut to keep from making any noises. Well… at least more than the squeak that slipped out…How could something tickle so badly and feel like a massage at the same time?! She was gonna be as good as a smelting pot… He tilted her face towards his own as she vented shakily letting her eyes reopen to be met with his worried visage. He studied her lifting her chin with his fingertips before returning them to his hand at the side of her helm again. Primus, he HAD to know how sweet it was! It was the same way he always checked on her after a battle, making sure she was unharmed before making sure Ratchet examined her anyway. He cared for all his soldiers and friends, yes. He didn’t even treat her better than anyone else, no favoritism or biases to the best of his abilities. And still, the urgency, the protectiveness the compassion, even if it was just as strong as he carried it for all his allies, a difference was there, and it was obvious.

“Yeah! I- I’m fine!” Elita practically spluttered taking a slight step backwards yet not removing her hands from his chest, nor tilting her cheek from his touch. “I just…” She stared up at him, feeling his spark thrumming against her hands, her own still echoing in her audials. Though his face had lightened slightly at her reassurance, his eyes still wore the weight of a familiar concern, almost sadness. Even if that look was familiar to her, she hated seeing it in his eyes. Maybe she hated it because it was so familiar to her. It wasn’t like either of them had ever been given a choice for what gave him that expression… “It’s nothing” she sighed breaking their gaze to glance at her hands on his spark then the ground. “I’m sorry I- I shouldn’t have said anything…” Optimus drew back slightly at this, seeming slightly hurt as she’d gone silent again. He let out a quiet vent, closing his optics as Elita squeezed her own shut before hanging her head further towards the ground, guilt growing more apparent by the second. Optimus shifted his hand slightly lower on the side of her face letting one of the tips of her helmet slide between his fingers as he worked the others beneath her chin tilting her face back towards him but not pulling it up again either. Gathering her resolve Elita looked at him. His eyes still had the same softness, but it wasn’t quite sad, not anymore. Her brows lifted in surprise as face plate slid neatly into their slots alongside his neck and helmet allowing a full yet still mostly neutral expression to be shown. He exhaled softly again lips sliding up into a soft smile, then a full-on smirk as he playfully arched an eyebrow at her again. It was softer than how he’d looked at her before, but this was a face she knew all too well, one she’d seen him make and probably even made herself more times than she could count. It was the face he’d made when Bumblebee pulled off an impressive trick but got himself hurt in the process. It was the face he made as WheelJack would ramble on about his ideas for inventions before he’d need to be reminded of budget, limited amounts of fire extinguishers and sometimes even what was and wasn’t scientifically possible, whether he had something to say about it or not. It was the face he made as Ratchet would rant and rave about how this entire team was ‘comprised of idiots’ then work himself to the core making sure his patients recovered. Optimus didn’t need to say a single word as his expression said it all not quite mocking yet still slightly teasing. Not feeling sorry for her in a condescending way but certainly obvious sympathy even potential threads of pity. Yep… Optimus was giving her his best ‘Oh what are we going to do with you?’ face. Son of a- He was doing the slow head shake and even had the GALL to let out that stupid soft chuckle! Elita scrunched her face back up at him, letting out a little grumble under her breath of words she hadn’t come up with yet. Optimus only laughed louder, failing to keep his entertainment to a closed mouth anymore and making Elita’s eyebrow twitch in irritation. He composed himself again taking in another deep vent as Elita glared, though he could see the sides of her lips twitching slightly. She was clearly desperate not to give him the satisfaction of smiling or cracking up too. So, didn’t give her time to do so.

She could only gasp as in one soft yet fluid motion, Optimus pulled her hands back into his chest with one hand lifting her face slightly again with the other before leaning in and planting a kiss on her cheek. He firmly pressed then held his lips there, sleepily closing his eyes. Elita’s jaw dropped, and eyes widened as far as they could go. She could feel her spark practically doing summersaults within her chest. Slowly and hesitantly, he pulled back, blinking his optics open. Even though she could clearly see him smiling at her with his nose almost brushing against her own, she could still feel his lips on her face. Wordlessly she slid her hands out from Optimus’s to touch it to the side of her cheek where they had been almost as if not believing it had really happened. Optimus brought his now free hand back to the base of his helmet glancing away for a moment before reclosing his optics and laughing. It was a joyous yet sheepish expression of delight and with his optics reclosed it was now more obvious the glow of his face wasn’t just coming from his eyes. Elita remained silent as he composed himself again and stared a bit behind him at the ground while lowering his hand from his head.

“Ha Ha Ha… Ahem… Ah... Merry Christmas Eli- mmMPH!” Elita had also given him no warning as she grabbed his shoulders and yanked him back down towards her, shoving her lips on his with a muffled grunt. It wasn’t quite ‘slamming’ into a kiss, but she definitely wasn’t being slow or gentle as he was either. Optimus’s optics snapped wide open while Elita seemed to be squeezing hers as tight as they could go, face pressed hard against his. She dared to peek an eye open slowly beginning to pull away as Optimus was now the one with his mouth hanging open, their lips still brushing against one another. She paused, opening her eyes the rest of the way as Optimus placed one hand on her hip the other slowly tracing its way back onto her arm and up her shoulder. Optimus’s own eyes were a question, a request for permission that he never would have needed to ask, yet he always did anyway. She answered with her smile and the whisper of laughter she finally let out. He smiled back before reclosing his optics and resealing their connection. Elita sighed peacefully, finally giving into him completely as he opened his mouth further to further secure the kiss. She reciprocated, soft mewls escaping between any gaps. Smiling against her, he pulled her closer to him their chests firmly pressed and sliding against one another. Elita arched her posture into the placement of his hand as he slid his open palm from her hips to glide across her back. She shivered again, not bothering to hide it this time. Her own arms slid down tracing her hands over his chest. His spark hummed strong against her caress before she reached back up his shoulders to wrap her arms around the back of his head. Whether the neck hug had pulled her higher or him lower couldn’t be deciphered, all they knew was that their chests were now perfectly aligned, sparks beating as one. Optimus tilted his head into the embrace, letting out a content sigh of his own. He shifted his weight slightly on his knees to lean further over her. Pressing his hand firmly between her shoulder blades, his fingers twitched as they tried not to curl and scrape against her plating. His other hand dragged down the side of her body, outlining the delicate form in his arms. Elita slowly raised her leg, starting to wrap it around Optimus’s waist as he continued his graceful glide from the top, side and finally to the base of her thigh. She leaned further into his supporting hand as he gave her thigh a gentle squeeze before lifting her into the air. The sudden rush of movement causing Elita to let out a surprised

“Oh!” Optimus laughed, leaning his helm against hers before raising his eyebrows in an expression that both teased yet also asked genuinely if she was alright. Elita blinked a few times before returning his laughter. She let out a sigh rolling her eyes. Whether the eyeroll was at herself or at him he couldn’t tell but didn’t care though. Her lips were on his again still slightly snickering against the contact. Optimus let out a half laugh, half exhale and continued to stand. In a single slow spin, he allowed both of their full weight to return to the bottoms of his feet. Both of their forms were silhouetted against the soft glow of the fireplace embers glinting against the metal figures. It was a dance that no one needed to see, not even the dancers. Especially not the dancers. He slid his forearm completely under both of Elita’s legs, lifting her to where she was now the one leaning over him. Optimus squeezed her legs snugly with the inside of his elbow while now supporting her uplifted leg below the knee. He arched his own back now as she leaned forward almost laying across his chest at an angle slowly lifting one of her feet. She wrapped her arms up and past his shoulders to hold his face in her hands. Elita murmured, her expression hardening slightly as she wrapped an arm around his head. She tilted her face to the side and pressed her face harder into his. She practically had his head in a locked hug, one arm wrapped all the way around to have her knuckles brushing her shoulder. The other arm traced up behind the first, lifting her fingers and twirling them around one of his antennae. Whether he was too polite or too shy to tell her how much he enjoyed it, the appreciative groan as she firmly massaged the tip between her digits was plenty. He slid his arm further around her back to better hold her up, his hand cradling the back of her helm. The two pressed in hard on one another one last time before finally breaking the kiss. Both bots held their optics closed as they slowly flickered back into their senses. Steam softly plumed from their vents and into one another’s gaping mouths, combining into single white puffs before fading into the air. Optimus opened his optics finally seeming to have caught his breath. His quirked, almost embarrassed grin perfectly reflected the irony in beings lacking lungs to have become so winded. Elita followed suit her eyes fluttering open now looking down at Optimus instead of up like usual. She took in a deep vent before blurting out the first thought that entered her mind.

“Merry Christmas Optimus…” she whispered, tilting her head to the side and tracing her fingers along the side of his face. Optimus beamed up at her, before closing his optics and smiling wider, leaning into her touch. Her faint smile began trickling its way further across her lips as she considered another silent conversation. His own raised eyebrows and questioning optics let her know just how little he minded the thought. “I love you…”

Thank you for making it to the end if you’ve read this far! I hope you got in some nice holiday opilita feels or even learned something new about mistletoe as I did writing this!

Emptiness Machine

Author note: Hey yall here is a link to my AO3 so you can find the work there as well! Hope the link works 😬

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61381396

Starscream X Reader (Mech Pilot AU)

Chapter 5

You squirm a bit in the too tight grip of the bot’s servos as he holds you. When the other blue bot had come in, he had switched back to speaking in Cybertronian. However, something about his expression when he looked down at you made you think he finally pieced it all together. You smile triumphantly up at him and narrow your eyes. You had successfully gotten under his plating.

The autobots had made it very clear to their human hosts that the Decepticons were nothing more than monsters. They weren’t to be trusted at all. But as you look between the two bots as they gaze down at you in horror, you can’t help but compare their reaction to the autobots. Both looked as if you might sprout another head at any moment. The one holding you looked absolutely affronted as his gaze darted from the scan displayed on the screen to you. You couldn’t read the other boxier mech, his mask and visor making it difficult to tell what he was feeling. But clearly he was one step ahead of the one who plucked you from the tube. You grimace and gasp suddenly unable to breathe.

“I’m still here. You’re starting to squish me you oaf.”

You say breathless as his servo tightens around your middle in his shock. Turning at your voice, he turns and dumps you unceremoniously back into the tube, knocking the breath out of you and making your head start to spin again. You try to pull yourself to your feet but fall against the side. Just in time to watch them both rush out muttering in their language. The door sliding shut once again.

‘What was the all about?’

You think as you try to gather yourself, glancing over at your mech and up to the top of the tube. It would be easy for you to shimmy your way up the thing if you could stop being so damn dizzy. You swallow back the wave of nausea that crashes over you. It’s not like you hadn’t been trained for things like this. You had run through scenario after scenario. But this one, this was unexpected. You had been told by the autobots that if a human were to be captured, it would end in their demise. A horrible gruesome one at that. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. The Decepticons did not care about preserving life.

Gripping the side of the glass container, you manage to lift yourself up and stand on wobbly legs. The adrenaline from the interaction was still coursing through you and making your hands shake as you stood slowly. You began an awkward climbing shimmy up the tube. Using your body and limbs to help you along. The tube wasn’t that high but it was high enough that you couldn’t just jump out. After reaching the rim, you take a moment to breathe and make sure no bots were around. Shockwave hadn’t returned. A lucky break. It was also lucky they had severely underestimated your ability to do anything. You smirk as you imagine the looks on their faces when they find you gone.

…

Starscream takes long strides towards Megatron’s throne room with Soundwave trailing after him. The communications officer had a point. That wasn’t just an organic creature. It was something straight out of a horror holo-drama. Something created in a lab that could turn the tide of the war in the Autobot’s favor. Lord Megatron needed to know about this immediately. If Shockwave hadn’t already informed his leader. The thought made him suddenly rock to a stop, Soundwave nearly crashing into his back as his wings flick. If Shockwave got ahold of this creature, if he figured out already that the humans can be infused with energon and used as weapons….

This wouldn’t do. This was something he could use. An advantage over his tyrannical leader. He had suspected for some time that Megatron was losing his grip on reality. Fueled by rage and hate for the leader of the Autobots.

Optimus prime.

His personal vendetta clouding his ability to make wise decisions as a leader. Starscream knew he couldn’t best him in battle but maybe…just maybe he could find a way to use this to his advantage. He turns to Soundwave, his voice thoughtful.

“Soundwave, we should keep this tidbit of information between us. You know how delicate Lord Megatron’s sensibilities have been lately. We wouldn’t want him putting barbaric ideas into Shockwave’s head. He’s already unstable as it is.”

Soundwave only nods. Looking back towards the lab where they left the human. Starscream huffed in exasperation. His companion still practically radiated anxiety for the little creature.

“We do need to get it out of Shockwave’s care. As SIC, I am responsible for prisoners. Not that glitched scientist. I’ll have the drones take her and that husk to the brig.”

He seemed sure of himself but the facilities on the Nemesis weren’t made to hold something so small. Something easily under ped. He thought for a moment as he stalked off on just how he was going to contain such an interesting threat. Soundwave turns. His loyalty to Megatron tempting him to go seek his counsel. But even he knew that his old friend wasn’t the same bot he used to be. He decided it’s in the human’s best interest that he keep it with him for now. Turning, he heads back towards the lab. Trusting something so fragile and small to Starscream of all mechs wasn’t sitting right with him. He pictured the small creature crushed in the seeker’s grip and shuddered.

…

You had climbed to the rim of the glass tube. Looking down at about a ten foot drop. Surely this wouldn’t be so bad? You brace yourself before jumping and landing hard. The sound echoing a lot more than you wish it would have. You freeze, waiting for someone to burst through the door. No one does and you smile. They hadn’t posted any guards outside. First mistake. They won’t make that mistake twice which means you get one shot at this. Peering over the edge of the table you look down at the almost thirty foot drop before pushing away feeling dizzy. Heights never bothered you but this, knowing you could fall to your death, was something different altogether. You take a deep breath and stepped back a few paces. It was a small jump from here to the inverted table and the arm of your mech. From there you could crawl up to her chest. Your head still pounding and chest still aching from the phantom pain, you brace yourself and run like mad for the jump.

Landing against her plating, you feel how cold she’s become. It wasn’t going to be a pleasant experience once you got inside. That ache in your chest reminding you of the gaping wound she possessed. You take a deep breath before climbing the rest of the way to the cockpit in her chest cavity. The damage was extensive. Torn proto-mesh and energon leaking from several damaged sections. At least Shockwave had been precise and missed all the main energon lines. This was salvageable. The pneumonic needle and gel cushion your body rested in were both still intact. You breathe a sigh of relief as you settle yourself back in. There was a small risk associated with re-establishing a severed connection but you pushed that out of your mind. You had to get out of here.

Closing your eyes and leaning back, you let your head fall into the gel. The familiar sting in the back of your neck barely noticeable as everything goes black. Blinding pain wracks your body as it comes online once more. You hold back a scream as your servos come up to clutch at your chest. Using your shaking servos, you try to close the plating as gently as you can around the tiny helpless body within. Bending the metal back in place makes you double over as the pain becomes almost unbearable. You groan and stumble off of the table. Noting the fact that your wrist restraints had been removed. They really underestimated you didn’t they. You get a small sliver of satisfaction in knowing you pulled one over on them as you stagger towards the door.

As you do, it slides open to reveal the blue mech from earlier. You hear him make a startled sound as you activate your jump jets and slam past him. Knocking him flat on his aft. He calls after you but you don’t hear it. Tearing through the hallways as fast as your jets will carry you. Wing panels flaring out to keep you stabilized as you search frantically for an exit.

Emptiness Machine

Starscream X Reader (mech pilot AU)

Author note: I am putting a trigger warning on this one because it mentions newsparks and alludes to Starscream thinking reader is carrying a newspark. Also because graphic depictions of violence.

If you are new here welcome! You can find my other fics and the other chapters HERE

Chapter 3

Shockwave listens as the door behind him shuts. None of this was making sense. He had seen it. The tiny almost imperceptible energy signature that even his highly sensitive optic hadn’t picked up at first. A newspark. He was sure of it. But what he had pulled from the chassis of that mech wasn’t a newspark at all. It was a human of all things. His servo shook as he balled it into a fist.

A wave of unfamiliar feeling crashed over him. Something he hadn’t experienced in a long time. His antennae flattened against his helm. The whole thing was most illogical. He began to stalk through the hallway. Muttering as he went, about newsparks and how it just wasn’t possible. He was so distracted by the conundrum of it that he almost barreled straight into Starscream. The mech immediately indignant at the perceived slight, sputtered as he dodged the boxy scientist. He had heard shockwave and paused, giving the scientist a confused look.

“What in primus’ name are you mumbling about now Shockwave. Some experiment of yours gone awry again?”

Starscream smirked as he blocked shockwave’s way, the bigger purple mech didn’t even seem to notice he was there. Pushing past the SIC shockwave stopped at the door to the med-bay continuing to mutter about newsparks and impossible things like that. Starscream’s wings flicked up in alarm at that.

“Newsparks? Shockwave you’ve been in that lab too long. There hasn’t been a newspark since…”

He stopped, looking back over his shoulder towards shockwave’s lab. Even he wasn’t evil enough to try and create life like that. He wouldn’t try to artificially create a newspark. That just wasn’t something he was interested in. Was it? Suddenly a deep sense of dread gripped Starscream. He knew an Autobot femme had been taken prisoner from the latest raid. Had that femme been sparked and shockwave somehow got ahold of it?

The energon in his lines ran cold. Sure he shouldn’t care about some Autobot femme. But he had believed for so long that his race was dying. That eventually this war would mean the end of the Cybertronians if he didn’t seize control from Megatron and stop his tyranny. Before he knew what he was doing he was sprinting headlong to Shockwave’s lab and bursting through the sliding doors. The scene that greeted him was a gruesome one. The femme was on his operating slab with her chest compartment torn open. Her optics were offline and she was leaking energon. To her left was a small vile containing the slumped figure of an organic. His optics widened as they fell on the tiny creature in the vile.

He’d seen the little organics on footage that the drones had picked up on their recon missions. Never in a million years did he think Shockwave of all bots would mistake the little insects for newsparks. Still, it all didn’t add up to him. Why had shockwave been so shaken and why had he offlined the Autobot prisoner instead of interrogating her for information. And in such a violent way. He turned his optics on the femme once more looking closer at her this time. Her chest compartment where her spark should be didn’t look quite right. Squinting his optics he tired to figure out what was missing. To his left a small noise startled him out of his quiet contemplation.

A loud noise jarred you awake making your head pound even harder. You tilt your head up a bit, eyes bleary and unfocused from the pain. Placing a hand on the cool glass you try to right yourself so you can better see what was making all that racket. A different Cybertronian was in the room with you now. His wings flicking in agitation as he stared at your mech.

“Hey you. Get back. Don’t touch that.”

Your voice barely coming out as a hoarse gasp as you tried to warn him off. He turns at your voice, mumbling deeply in his own language. It hadn’t occurred to you that the Decepticons wouldn’t have had the need to scan the native life. Their language not something that was relevant as the Decepticons only sought the energon on the planet. The humans were little more than insects to them. You look up at him, trying to get your eyes to focus. With every ounce of strength you have left, you take a deep breath and as loud as you possibly can, utter the only phrase in Cybertronian you had been taught. All the pain and anger and fear of the last hour building up in your chest as you scream at him.

“GO FRAG YOURSELF!”

Emptiness Machine

Starscream X Reader (mech pilot AU)

Author note: sorry for not updating for awhile but here is chapter 2! Might release chapter 3 today…

Chapter 2

Spinister. That name meant nothing to you but clearly he was a force to be reckoned with. You look sideways at the lambo twins just in time to see them shift anxiously on their peds. You look to Bee for confirmation.

“Are we rushing them or are we going to regroup.”

There was a moment of silence and then a deep rumbling started behind you. You turned to see sideswipe with his denta bared in rage. You remembered the bot had revealed the Decepticons had razed his town back on cybertron. The twins lost everyone they knew. His servos flexed at his side.

“I’m taking them NOW!”

Before anyone else could react he darted from behind the iron doors and into the cavern.

“Wait Sides no!”

Bee shouts after him. His twin on his heels and Cliffjumper cursing in Cybertronian as he launches himself in as well. Michael whoops from behind you and dives forward leaving only you and Bumblebee. The scout mumbles a muted “Primus…” before gesturing for you to follow him. The scene is in chaos. Both lambo twins had jumped Spinister and had the con firing aimlessly trying to shake them off. Shockwave was aiming his cannon at Cliff who was occupied trying to grab the humans who hadn’t been turned into red goop.

Michael leapt at Shockwave, grabbing his cannon in his mech’s massive servo and crunching the barrel on the end so it couldn’t fire. He looked at Michael as if he hadn’t seen him before. Tilting his head and examining him before taking action. The con took a swing, knocking Michael to send him sprawling into Cliffjumper who had just seconds ago safely tucked the two survivors in his subspace. The two knocked into Spinister who brought his ped down hard on Michael’s arm. You launch yourself at Shockwave who turns as if surprised to see you just as he had done with Michael.

‘Is he partially blind?’ You think as he examines you before muttering to himself. The fins on his expressionless faceplate flaring out as he brings a massive servo up to swat you out of the way. Instead his digits close around the arm of your mech and he begins dragging you towards a familiar circle of light. A ground bridge. When did that open up? Alarm jangles through you as you realize what’s about to happen.

“Spinister stop playing. It’s time to go. We got what we came for.”

Came the growling, deep voice from above you. Shockwave didn’t even look at you as you struggled in his grip. The other Decepticon breaking free of the twins and joining the scientist near the bridge. You desperately com the others, screaming into your mic for help. The expression of horror on Bumblebee’s faceplate was the last thing you see as you are dragged through the ground bridge to wherever the cons are taking you. His voice cut off as the swirling light envelops you.

“Sera! Wait shockwave! That’s not—”

The awful pulling sensation of the ground bridge nearly makes you pass out as Shockwave drags you along. You aren’t even standing now, the scientist has his fist locked around your wrist. The sound of scraping metal and the smell of ozone cloud your senses. It’s dark here. The halls lit with an almost sterile purple glow. You pass drone after drone. None looking your way as you dangle from the fist of the enemy. After passing through several corridors and through double doors, you enter what you think must be his lab. The feeling you get when you enter makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up. You can feel it even through the split consciousness. Goosebumps erupting on the skin of the small body inside you. Insidious was an understatement. Tools and gadgets lined shelf after shelf. An assortment of wicked looking drills lay on a tray next to an inverted table.

Without saying a word or even glancing your way, Shockwave lifts you to rest against that inverted table. As if you weigh nothing at all. Cuffs lock around your hand, pinning it in place. You try to keep your other hand out of his reach. Using the fact that his cannon is damaged to your advantage and kicking at him with your peds. He takes the blows, not even moving when you kick at him. Reaching around he wrenches your other arm up to join the other. You let out a growl deep within your chest. Fear mixing with anger now as you watch him above you. Just observing you. Quietly curious and unsettling.

“Your energy signature is non existent. But you do not have an active cloaking device.”

He pauses for a moment to scan my chassis.

“What are you.”

It was framed more as a statement than a question. Gritting your denta you snarl back at him. Trying to make seem like none of this scares you. He doesn’t react when you make the sound. Rather, he turns to the display mounted near the table and studies the scan. You can see that it reveals the tiny organic body inside your chest. Your body, you remind yourself. Sometimes it’s hard to remember that you aren’t Cybertronian. He whips around digging a massive servo into your chest plating and prying open the compartment. It hurts. Pain ripping through your receptors to make you scream. Writhing against his grip as you fade in and out of consciousness from the sudden trauma. Energon leaks from the proto-armor underneath your plating protecting your small form inside. You vent raggedly as he grabs a scalpel and slices at your metal flesh to reveal the cockpit where you sit. Unconscious and slumped over in the gel seat, your body feeling delicate and exposed again.

“Stop stop stop! You can’t!”

And he’s reaching again. Gentle digits now curling around your body before you even have a chance to run disconnection protocols. You can feel your consciousness bouncing back and forth between the two vessels as the pneumonic needle slides uncomfortably out of the back of your neck. Gasping in a breath, you open your eyes. Wet with tears as you try to come awake. White light clouds your vision and sounds are muffled as the red glow of the scientist’s lone optic bathes you in ruddy light. Groaning incoherently, you hear him make a deep rumbling sound. One you’ve heard before when the auto bots speak Cybertronian to one another. Your mech had been translating this whole time. You shake your head trying to clear it. You didn’t know any Cybertronian and couldn’t communicate with him without your mech.

Before you can process what’s happening, he dumps you into a glass tube and sets it on a table next to your mech. You watch as he walks towards the door and leaves you there disoriented and unable to move. Your limbs feel achy and you can still feel the phantom pain of your chest being ripped open. Hands moving over your body you don’t feel any actual injuries. He hadn’t been rough with your actual body now that you think of it. His hands had been warm and gentle when he lifted you free of your mech. Looking around you try to get your bearings. It takes a moment for you to get your feet under you to stand, your legs shaky and weak. You only topple back down to the cold glass floor of the container when you try to move. Giving up, you lay there hoping sleep will take you and the pounding in your head will cease.

as a reader, I LOVE a slow burn

as a writer, I hate them <3

A Heartstruck Collision - CH3

‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

Masterlist

Pairing: Zach Hadel x f!Reader

Warnings: None

A/N: Wanted to post this way earlier but oh well- This Chapter features a little more coworkers and a little introduction to Zach

Tags: If you wanna get tagged for the next chapters, just let me know!

‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

You had survived the 30 minute walk to the office, albeit you ran out of breath in an embarrassingly short amount of time, you’d just blame the hot california air for that though. 

You were on your first break as of now, another few frames already finished and Raphael already started to clean up the first few opening frames to get a look at how it would turn out. 

Just as you were about to take a sip from your coffee, you were startled by a voice coming from behind you.

“How are my favorite animators doing!?” Luckily you didn't spill the hot liquid over yourself. You turned around to watch Arin lean over Hayley’s shoulder. “Whoaaa, Arina looks so good dude!” Ross was laughing at that, of course that’s what Arin would pay attention to most. 

“Damn, you guys are working crazy hard on this.” Dan seemingly appeared out of nowhere, the cup of coffee now tightly clutched in your hands. God, they seemed like entities that just popped up whenever. 

Ross suddenly jumped up from his seat: “Oh by the way, good that you guys are here now.” Arin and Dan’s heads shot up immediately. “So yesterday we bumped into Chris and he made the suggestion that we could maybe make a deal with Adult Swim in terms of where to stream the show.” 

“What do you mean?” It was funny seeing Arin go into Business mode. His whole demeanor switched up and you once again realized that while yes, he was the funny internet video game boy, he was also your boss now and the owner of quite a big company. 

“Cause’ Netflix takes everything from their creators.” Ross argued.

“And Zach and Michael made Smiling friends on Adult Swim and they never had any complaints.” He continued, Arin furrowed his brow. 

“Well I guess you’re right but like- we can’t just call 'em up and ask about it, I’d have to do meetings and tell them about the premise and ughh..” Arin groaned. Not the kind of groan which wanted to shut you down but rather one that just acknowledged how annoying the process would be.

“But we did all that with Netflix already, just didn’t file a contract yet.” Dan looked over at Arin, his voice was positive as usual. “Yeah but I’d have to do it all over again.” He whined, earning a sarcastic eye roll from Dan. “I mean we can help out as well you know..” Hayley chimed in. 

“That’s true I suppose, I’ll give you guys an update as soon as possible alright? Did Chris say anything about talking to Zach?” 

Ross nodded.

“Who is that Zach guy by the way?” You turned around to Dan who was now sitting on the corner of your desk. 

“Oh he’s like a friend. Maybe Psychicpebbles rings any bells?” You slowly shook your head, raking through your brain to possibly find a file labeled something similar. 

“He’s so fucking funny dude.” Arin said, stepping closer to you to get a look at your screen as well. “Also he has a very interesting manner of speech.” 

Dan laughed at that statement. “Yeah he has like this super nasally voice, the guy’s awesome.” 

You let out a breathy laugh. The kind of uncertain laugh that was only used when you weren’t sure about something but everyone else was apparently getting a joke. 

“And he made, what was it called? Smiling Friends?” “Yep.” 

Smiling friends..

Yeah that you had heard before. You even vaguely remember to have briefly scrolled past it yesterday. If your memory wasn’t betraying you that is. 

“Is ist popular?” You felt rude asking that question yet it was more or less meant in a way for yourself to evaluate whether or not you were actually familiar with the entire L.A. scene.

“I'd say so.” Dan answered with a shrug. Popularity wasn't really something that mattered to him, as far as you knew from his band and what he has said on Game Grumps on many occasions. 

You leant back in your chair, the drawing you had made yesterday night popping into your mind. 

Could this be counted as a weird obsession? You'd hope not, after all you were more curious than anything to find out who this Zach guy was. 

Maybe you should look up Chris’ channel? Nope, that would definitely feel like stalking. But then again, you wondered, why? It’s a public channel, probably a big one as well. 

Grabbing the pen from where you had left it, you just decided to get on with it and simply wait until you met him, if you even did. 

Dan stayed next to you, intrigued about the process and so you distracted your mind by drawing and explaining everything to him in grave detail, which he attentively listened to, occasionally asking questions. 

*** 

You were happy with your work today. if it weren't for Ross’ fear of all of you getting a burnout you would have continued for another three hours at least. 

“Hey (y/n)!” 

You turned around, bag already slung over your shoulder. 

“Oh, you were about to go home now?” 

Hayley held a deck of cards in her right hand. 

“Uh I mean yeah, what's up?” 

“Thought we could play a game of cards real quick?” 

Raphael peeked up behind her, sitting at the little coffee table adjacent to your workspace. 

‘Why not?’ you thought and shrugged. You put the bag down beside you and sat next ro Raphael. As Ross had said before: Team Building and stuff. 

***

Raphael had won three out of three rounds and Hayley was growing frustrated. What was especially amusing though was to see the otherwise shy guy gain more and more confidence with every good card he put down. Then again, watching Hayley bite her lip excessively while trying to figure out what cards you both had was equally funny. 

“I give up.” She said dramatically, throwing her hand open onto the table. 

“Does the fact that the French made these cards give you some kind of buff?” she groaned into her hands, earning a laugh from Raphael. 

“Nope, just got luck on my side.” 

You were truly happy about the fact that you had basically landed a jackpot with these coworkers. The conversations that had started up while you had been playing didn't feel forced, not like anyone was trying to force themselves to get along. 

“(y/n)?” Hayley spoke up again. “Hmmm?” 

You had been absentmindedly shuffling the cards through your hands, one falling down as Hayley startled you. 

“You just moved to L.A. right?” You nodded with a strained noise as you tried to reach for the card which had fallen under the table, hair falling into your face. 

“We could go to this cat café that opened up! it shouldn't be too far away from here I think. We could go next Thursday, I should be free by then!” 

You had finally found it, victoriously you held it up before putting it in a random spot in the deck. 

“Sure, I'd love to!” 

A cat café did sound nice. The town next to where you grew up had one but you had only gonewent there like two times before they had to close up. The cats had been very cuddly though. 

“I have an appointment on that day..” Raphael said with a disappointed tone, seemingly sad about his own schedule. 

“Well then it's a girls date- we can go there again though.” 

The ease with which Hayley said all that was truly baffling to you. If you had been in her place you would probably have tried to make ends meet immediately which would have just resulted in an unoriented mess where you would never end up going anyway. 

Raphael agreed to your plans and then was quick to be on his way home. You and Hayley stayed behind for just a little, saying bye to everyone that was still left along with the two of you. 

You were happy to finally drive your car back home this evening and fell asleep with the thought of a nice day of getting to know L.A. next week.

A Heartstruck Collision - CH2

‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

Masterlist

Pairing: Zach Hadel x f!Reader

Warnings: Alcohol consumption and a weird hypothetical

A/N: Zach is mentioned for the first time let's goooo

Tags: If you wanna get tagged for the next chapters, just let me know!

‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

“Ughh, that is disgusting dude..” Ross closed his eyes, trying to shield his mind's eye from what Chris had just said. 

“Hey don’t shoot the messenger, I’m only re-telling what Zach asked me!” Chris said with a fit of giggles accompanying it. 

“Yeah but that’s like- No dude, I wouldn’t!” Another giggle from Chris who now looked over at you:

“Alright, (y/n) what do you think?” You really tried to ponder over the hypothetical but the alcohol in your bloodstream was telling you that ‘yes, and’ couldn’t be the answer to everything. “No, I wouldn’t!” 

The hypothetical stated that if you were alone in the world and the only other person was a relative, whether or not you’d sleep with them to save the human race. Nope, there was truly no comeback to counter this one.

“I’m still not convinced that Zach isn’t a social experiment.” Ross said, rubbing his eyes. You didn’t know who the guy was but apparently he had more of these theoretical situations which he regularly posed as questions to his friends. 

At this point, the bar was practically empty. Hayley and Raphael had left about an hour ago and if you were honest, you were growing quite tired as well. 

“By the way, what was that about Game Gyaru? Like where is it gonna be streaming?” 

Chris asked, clearly suppressing a yawn himself. 

Ross, Jackson and you looked at each other, Jackson just shrugged and returned the focus to his drink. “Well I guess for now the plan was to have the Pilot air on youtube and then i dunno, I think Arin said something about having talked with Netflix?” Ross frowned, not entirely sure if he was right about the thing. 

You nodded along, that was about what was written in the mails that went around.  

“Ugh but Netflix sucks with this kinda stuff. You won't even get any profit off of those media vampires.” Chris stated, the alcohol definitely turned him more confrontational. 

“Well what do you propose we should do then?” You asked.

“I mean, adult swim is like pretty fucking good with their creators. My friends also have a series on there and they never complained about anything.” 

Ross suddenly appeared to be in thought, Jackson had also perked up again. 

“Welp, anyway I think I'm gonna head home, tired as hell.” Chris stood up, you copied. Going home was definitely in order now. 

“We should talk to Arin about reaching out to Adult Swim, might be a good idea.” 

You agreed absentmindedly but that was a thought for tomorrow. 

Chris and you walked outside, the air hitting your lungs in a weird way. 

“Aw fuck..” you whispered. 

“Huh?” 

You truly were smart sometimes. Drinking alcohol when you still had to drive home. It was a short drive, yes, but still a bad idea. 

“I just realized I still gotta drive home, guess walking for 30 minutes is gonna sober me up nicely.” you let out a laugh realizing that getting angry about the situation wouldn't solve it regardless.  

“Oh shit, yeah you're right.” 

Chris probably wanted to go home but with your confession, he probably felt bad or that it would be awkward if he left now. Instead he put a hand on your shoulder, lightly tapping it with an apologetic smile. 

“I know we don't know each other but I could walk you home? Just for safety and all that. Or maybe Ross and Jack-” 

"Chriiis!" 

A car pulled up and stopped right in front of the bar. There was no traffic going on so there was no urgency to find a parking spot. 

“Lyle you son of a bitch- you're like what-” Chris looked at his phone. 

“1 ½ hours late! You stood me up man..” 

“Oh shit really?” The guy inside the car seemingly looked at the time and then started laughing. 

“Holy fuck I’m sorry!” He wiped a tear from the corner of his eye. Talk about time management. 

“You could drive us home though, that's (y/n) by the way. We've both got alcohol in our system so we need a ride.” 

Part of you wanted to protest, you didn't want to be a bother on your first day of meeting all of these people. The rational part of your brain decided against it though, Chris surely wouldn't have made the offer if he thought it would be a burden. And Lyle also seemed like a sweet guy. 

Without wasting much time, the both of you got into his black car. 

Quickly you gave Lyle your address to which he thankfully replied with a: “No problemo.”

The smile was apparent in his tone of voice. 

The car ride went by in a comfortable silence, Chris here and there talked about who you were and about the Game Gyaru Series, saying he'll talk to Zach about it, the guy who was still faceless in your head. You wondered if you'd ever get to fill in that gap.

***

You waved them goodbye as you got out of the car, having thanked Lyle about a hundred times already to which he simply replied with a genuine smile. 

Waddling over to the apartment complex, you realized that they drove off only when you had actually entered the place, ‘how nice’ you thought as you walked up the stairs. 

When you entered your apartment, the first thing you did was throw your shoes to the side and drop down on the couch. Although you had been tired and ready to sleep for the entire duration of the drive, now you felt more awake than ever. You groaned, thinking about how you had to walk to work tomorrow and quickly grabbed the remote, trying not to dwell on it for too long. 

“What did he say the show was called?” You mumbled to yourself, clicking through the shows presented on your smart tv. Did Chris even say what it was called? That guy, Zach, made the show, that was all you knew. No last name and no face. Exhausted, you turned the tv off again and slumped over to your desk. 

It was one of those weird states of mind where your body was tired and ready to collapse and yet your mind had that last little ounce of ‘can't sleep’ which could keep you up for who knows how long. 

Perhaps doodling a little might help tiring your mind? Pinterest was opened multiple times and closed just as many times. Nothing you were in the mood for was showing up on your front page and you didn't have any ideas on what to search up for inspiration. 

Maybe draw the evening? 

And that is what you did. You tried your best to draw a little sketch of Ross, Jackson, Chris and you in the booth. Jackson's head was resting on the table, at that point he had been very out of it. Meanwhile Ross and you were arguing with Chris about the strange hypothetical. A little speech bubble coming from Chris, a man whose face was replaced by a question mark was in it. 

Maybe it hadn't been your best drawing but it definitely was a fun addition to your sketchbook. 

Finally feeling tired enough, you slumped over to your bed, practically falling into it after setting your alarm for an hour earlier.

A Heartstruck Collision

‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

Masterlist

Pairing: Zach Hadel x f!Reader

Warnings: None

A/N: This is gonna be a slow burn fanfiction and Zach won't show up til some chapters in so I hope you can have a little patience for me :> This is super self indulgent btw as you can see from me making Game Grumps an intrinsic part of the story

Tags: If you wanna get tagged for the next chapters, just let me know!

‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

Living in L.A was.. different, to say the least.

Don't get it confused, it wasn't horrible but it certainly was a different experience from what you had known of a “normal life” up until that point.

If you had to use just three words to sum it up, you'd probably say: loud, busy but fun.

You had moved there a few weeks ago after landing a job as an animator at the Game Grumps Company. Your bosses, Arin Hanson And Daniel Avidan, had, after years of only talking about it and never acting on it, started working on an animated Series called “Game Gyaru”.

The ad hadn't just drawn you in because you had been a fan of them for many years, but also because of the style that they were going for. 90's anime with all the good stuff: Magical Girl Transformation, feel good humor and beautiful sparkly, saturated images.

Not only the job offer was great in and of itself but the pay you were about to receive would definitely make up for some of the left over student debt as well as the fact that your apartment was being paid for you by Arin or rather, his company.

They say “never meet your heroes” but in this particular case, you might've just gotten extremely lucky.

You had your first meeting with the Grumps just a week ago. It hadn't been anything special. A few awkward handshakes, tripping over your own words and an introduction to your new workspace (which featured one of the most expensive and fancy drawing tablets you had ever seen by the way) and of course, a brief meeting with your future colleagues. Well- a brief meeting with their names so to speak.

Apparently Ross O'Donovan, which you had been following as well, would be working on the project alongside you in addition to some other names that you haven't had a face in mind to connect them with.

They were most likely cut from the same cloth as you, other kids who just graduated from an art school that totally drained them and that have been begging for a stable job and finally getting a chance to put their degree to something useful.

As you had gotten home after your first day there, it had felt surreal. It still did even a week later and the mere thought of what your younger self would say if they saw you working under their favorite content creators was definitely tripping you up (hence the periodical screeches you had let loose whenever you thought about the matter at hand)

Much to your dismay though, all of the excitement for your new job was not enough to get you to finally properly move into your home. There were still about a dozen boxes standing around, just waiting for you to finally confront all of the useless stuff you had bought and acquired over the years.

Then again, you justified the leftover boxes by saying that you had already unpacked all of the very important stuff like dishes or clothes and yet you knew that someday you would have to face the consequences of your own procrastination.

“Did you just move in?”

“Oh no I uh.. I've been living here for a year now”

You could already hear the conversation happening in real time if there ever came a moment where you invited someone over.

‘Not today though” you thought, a sleepy yawn accompanying It. The last few days had been spent wandering around L.A or doodling various characters to try and get yourself in the right headspace for the coming months. An Art-Block would definitely be the worst thing that could happen right now so drinking in the entirety of a new city should hopefully keep your inspiration going.

Deciding to wrap up for today though, you finished your glass of water and closed your sketchbook, letting the pen collide with the hardcover of the book.

The apartment wasn't really big, yet that was absolutely fine. It meant that keeping the place clean was going to be significantly easier and the chances of losing your keys or important letters sank by at least 5%.

Just as you closed your bedroom door behind you, your phone vibrated in your pocket.

>>Hey there! Arin wanted to text you himself about tomorrow but he got kinda caught up so I just wanna make sure you're ready for tomorrow? :D<<

The text you had gotten was from Ally. She often aided Dan and Arin with their endeavors and all of their projects so it was no surprise that she also assisted with this one. Your encounter with her last week had been quite short lived yet her welcoming personality had you immediately feeling like this was going to be a comfortable working environment and one of the first things she had said to you was:

“And if there is anything you need, you can always come to me, I've got an ear for everyone”.

If that wasn’t the sweetest first thing you had ever heard while being somewhere completely new, you didn't know what was.

>>Hi :) Yeah I'm good, a little nervous but I'm sure I'll manage o7<<

You threw the phone onto your bed, pulling out your pajamas and putting them on, another vibration from your phone telling you that Ally had probably responded.

>>Oh yeah I totally get that dw! Just for your own peace of mind though, you really don't gotta get caught up with putting on a show or acting super professional, we're all friends here :D<<

You couldn't help but smile at that message. That interaction alone contradicted everything that you had heard about working life. Your parents and teachers had done a great job with the whole “that won't fly later in life” and yet here you were, using emoticons while speaking with one of your superiors.

Part of you was excited to rub it in their faces the next time you would call and yet you knew that they probably wouldn't look at animation as being a serious job. At least not if you weren't working for an actual company that had their shows playing on public tv.

Even though it was a sad thing to think about, they'd probably be more impressed if you were working on Family Guy.

With a tired sigh you plopped down on your bed, the slatted frame squeaking beneath your weight.

You contemplated for a second about whether or not you should cover yourself with your blanket. Another aspect that needed adjusting was the heat.

Luckily your apartment had air conditioning but you didn't want it running the whole time. Just because someone was paying for your place didn't mean that you had to max out every cost as much as possible.

Before drifting off to sleep, you decided on the old “one leg covered and one not”, using your body's built-in AC system (which actually worked quite well).

As you slowly succumbed to your own tiredness, your head was filled with all kinds of different images. Some were familiar, clearly influenced by the events of the past days but there were some which didn't quite fit into any picture.

You had met one of your, up until now unknown, colleagues. His face was obscured, your mind clearly leaving out the one part which would make it realistic.

You couldn't really make out what the conversation was about, only the feeling of butterflies to indicate what it was about.

Your hands had touched briefly as he took the pen from your hands, leaning over your shoulder from where you were sitting at your desk. You swore that your body actually started to heat up from what was just a random dream.

He was correcting your drawing a little and then he looked at you, his face so close to yours now and even though he had no face you just knew that he was smiling at you, his gaze softly looking at your lips and back into your eyes.

Gently, he put the pen down onto your desk while you were slowly closing the distance between you.

You felt his breath on your skin, his lips ghosting over yours, almost, finally touching-

“Ughhh what the fuuuck…”

Alright, your first paycheck would buy you an alarm that doesn't sound like an army drill.

Rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you slowly sat up in your bed. Motivation to start your job wasn’t necessarily the issue, of that you had enough. Sadly though, your sleep schedule had a mind of it’s own. Still remembering all the nights you had spent up and working on your portfolio only for some company that ended up using the Chairman’s son (who had no degree or any creative abilities whatsoever) to design their new bougie logo.

Some might say that there was bitterness attached to memories such as those.

Deciding that huffing and puffing over previous job opportunities wouldn’t get you out of bed though, you finally stood up. Immediately regretting it as you felt your head spin from the sudden movement.

Maybe a little less motivation?

You slowly made your way toward the small kitchen, coffee being the only thing on your mind when it came to the matter of waking up. As you waited for the old machine to get started, you went back into your bedroom. Opening the wardrobe and looking at it. Contemplating.

You wanted to seem put together but also not too much - didn’t want to set expectations that you would only be able to hold up for a week maximum.

A simple t-shirt and jeans. Yeah, that is business casual, right?

In a way you felt stupid for even having to think about the whole thing. It would most likely be no issue if you showed up in sweatpants and a tank top for your whole time being there, as long as your work was good nothing else mattered.

Especially working as an animator, you had learned from personal experience that after 30 minutes your body seemed to magically shift into the most absurd positions anyway. So better be comfortable than not.

After donning on the not so carefully planned outfit, you walked back to your now steaming coffee. One look at the watch on our wrist told you that you had about 20 minutes left. Downing the beverage in a span of time that would definitely result in stomach issues, you opted for the bathroom. The mantra here was the same as with the clothes: Not too much but not too little.

***

The office was nicely cooled, a stark contrast to the humidity outside. You already heard many unfamiliar voices coming from your workspace, nervousness bubbling up inside you. ‘What are these other people like?Would they be way better at this whole stuff?’ Would they fire you if they saw that the others were more qualified? Usually you wouldn’t talk so negatively about the degree that you had worked so hard to get and yet in moments like these you always felt so inferior.

“Yeah, (y/n) should be here any minute now as well.”

As you heard Ally’s voice, you took one last deep breath. ‘It’ll be fine, just play it cool. You’ve come this far’

Turning the corner to the animator’s space, you were met with three unfamiliar faces. They weren’t scary looking or anything, the whole scene itself just felt comical and intimidating. As if you had been intruding on something even though they had been waiting specifically on you.

“Hey, sorry, hope I’m not late or anything?” You glanced at your watch once agin. Just on time.

“Oh no, we all showed up more or less right now so nothing to worry about!” Ally showed you a sympathetic smile to which you couldn't help but reply with one of your own.

The introductions luckily went by quite fast, leaving little room for any awkward silences that you always dreaded when it came to meeting new people.

For one, there was Hayley who seemed to come straight out of the hipster era from the 2000’s. She had long blonde hair that went far past her shoulders and was contrasted starkly by the red beanie which she had pulled halfway over her head so that a lot of the fabric was casually hanging down at the back of her head. It was already clear as she introduced herself that she was an energetic type of person. That and the fact that she had been living in L.A for 3 years now, definitely made you feel a little inferior, even though she seemed friendly.

Jackson, a tall brunette guy whose style was very normal (in a good way), had also been living here with his girlfriend for about one and a half years now. The way he talked and the ease with which he spoke made him appear confident and yet there was something very humble about him. Perhaps a sort of ‘gentle giant’?

Lastly, there was Raphael. He came over to the USA all the way from France and although his english was as good as that of any foreigner who dismissively says that their “english wouldn't be very good” (which was the universal sign of their english surpassing even shakespeare), he still had a french accent which drew everyone in as he was talking. It sounded so much more fancy even though it was just a regular introduction. His hair was tightly coiled at the top and what especially stood out about Raphael was the white tattoo on his right forearm. The white ink stood out like it was some magic seal and depicted a moth breaking out from its cocoon, one wing already free'd.

Out of the other two, he was the most timid one and the only one that felt like he felt as out of place as you did.

“Alright, now that all of us are here, I just wanna make sure that all of you got the mail about the concept for the Pilot?”

Everyone agreed in a half-unison “yeah”.

The Idea for the Pilot was quite simple in and of itself. It was no secret that the whole series was heavily inspired by shows like Sailor Moon or Cowboy Bebop which is why it was set in a sci-fi world which still felt all retro-y. The episode was supposed to start with a little sequence in which Arina was playing an arcade game in their little spaceship and of course, she was losing and punching the machine. Then, Daniella was supposed to come into frame and tell her, in typical Dan-fashion, that it was alright to which they’d have a little banter.

Afterwards, the actual story of the series was supposed to begin. Their superior, a man who coincidentally had a lot of similarities to Barack Obama, informs them about a mission. A woman apparently paged them because her son was acting strange.

The whole episode basically forms about one bit where Arin pretended to be a monkey child called Franklin that was out of control. With the crucial detail that this behavior was caused by some cursed jewelry. The Pilot should end by Arina and Daniella stopping the main villain's henchman who was hexing said jewelry - meeting the big bad guy in the end as well. Typical foreshadowing.

After the brief recap of what was about to happen, all of you sat down on your desks, getting comfortable with the new equipment. Since Arin and Dan had already evaluated some of your concept art and decided upon which would be the best way to start, it was basically just piecing together the puzzle. Well, a puzzle which had to be drawn up and then cleaned multiple times but still.

After a while of experimenting and Jackson and Hayley actually getting somewhere with their segments, Ross also entered the office.

“Sorry I’m late everyone, I had to work on this other thing as well. I'll try to be on time in the future.”

All four of you reassured him immediately, partly also because you all had immense respect for the guy and his abilities.

“What have you gotten so far?”

“Me and Hayley just finished sketching up like three frames of our scenes.”

Ross nodded, trying to see where he could fit into the picture.

“You guys are still getting used to the program?”

His gaze fell onto Raphael and you who could only reply with a sheepish smile in return.

Was it bad that you weren't working as fast?

“If we have to hurry up you can tell us, it's just like new and all. I for one never worked on an actual series up until now.” Raphael spoke up, his accent naturally swallowing up certain letters.

Ross immediately put up his hands:

“Oh no, no, all good! I just wanted to check where everyone was at.”

He scratched his chin, seemingly in thought.

“Okay, this might sound super stuck up and shit but should I maybe take on the role of director? If I remember correctly from your portfolios, none of you have worked on a series so far, which isn't a bad thing-” he hastily added in between.

“I'm just saying cause I've been here the longest as well. Might make things a tad bit easier for all of us.”

It really didn't sound arrogant, it was just the truth after all. No one opposed the idea of having someone as an actual director, seeing that it would probably help the entire flow of the team in the future.

After a brief discussion of how the program worked and how to approach the whole project in the best way, the tension that had been present in the room before practically dissolved immediately.

Ross, having worked with multiple animators already, was definitely educated in how to make beginners feel alright with their abilities and there was a silent aura of thankfulness surrounding all four of you as you continued to work.

***

“Whew, good job everyone! Holy shit that is like so much for one day!” Ross looked at your screens with an astounded expression.

Very much exhausted from concentrating and your hand having cramped up like five times today, you finally stretched. It was one of those that made you feel dizzy and like you were ascending into another plane of existence.

“Do you guys have any plans now?” Ross asked, cracking his fingers one by one.

“Nope, not really. Well, aside from sleeping.” Hayley let out a breathy laugh and got up from her chair.

“I’d invite you guys out for a drink if you want to, some team building and what not.”

That offer would definitely not be turned down.

Ross had mentioned a pub that was actually in walking distance (a miracle from what you knew of American cities). And so, after telling Arin that you'd be finished for today, you guys made your way over there.

The conversations were held light, except for Jackson who saw this as a great opportunity to shower Ross in compliments about his works. The Australian seemed to be slightly overwhelmed by the onslaught of support but he hid it quite gracefully.

You stayed behind everyone as you walked, your social battery needing to be refilled a little before entering a place where conversation was inevitable. You weren't opposed to social interaction, you pretty much appreciated it and realized that you needed it and yet being in a new environment with what were basically just strangers (no matter how famous they were online), was absolutely draining.

As you entered the bar, you were immediately hit with the smell of alcohol and sweat. It wasn’t irritatingly strong but it was recognizable by everyone as you entered, faces twisting for just a split second.

Ross sauntered over to the counter, it was clear that he knew the barkeeper behind it. She vaguely gestured to a corner of the establishment, a little round booth where you were supposed to sit down.

You were leaning back against the soft cushioning off the wall, stretching your legs beneath the round table. The bar looked quite nice, you had to admit.

The whole place looked like it came straight out of another century but not worn out or scuffed. No, it looked fairly well looked after and it seemed that there was definitely no shortage of customers. If anything, you had gotten lucky that Ross had connections or otherwise the plans of a drink after work would have been quickly snuffed out.

The conversations started flowing once again after everyone had gotten their drinks. You mostly decided to listen, chiming in here and there if you had anything in mind that you thought would contribute nicely to the conversation. Otherwise you just sipped on your beverage from time to time, letting the alcohol relax you a little bit more, your fingers still hurting a bit from the way you were holding the pen the entire day.

“Yeah, my parents weren’t really happy with me moving across the entire world.” Raphael confessed, a look of guilt on his face. “I can imagine, you gotta tell us what it’s like in France, I’ve always wanted to go!” Hayley exclaimed, interest clear in her voice.

“It’s not super special, although the cities look nicer, no offense!” Raphael giggled. That you had to agree with. The beach was about the nicest thing in L.A that you had seen so far. Not to mention, walkable cities, who?

“I’ve been to europe once and yeah, it’s like entirely different with how the streets are and all-”

“Ross?”

You all looked up to the voice that interrupted the conversation.

“Oh Chris, what the fuck? What are you doing here?”

Ross got up and hugged the guy whose name apparently was Chris. Could that be the guy from DoodleDoods back then? You remember enjoying the creepy things he used to draw up seemingly on the spot. Didn’t he also have a gaming channel? What was the name again? Oney or something?

“I wanted to come here with Lyle but I think the fucker forgot or something cause I can’t find him anywhere.” He half laughed, he didn’t seem to actually be bitter about it.

“Aw that sucks, well yeah I’m here with my new animation team!” He excitedly pointed toward the four of you now awkwardly sitting in the booth. You gave a little wave to Chris who showed me a little smile in return.

“Animation- oh yeah right! The Game Gyaru thing I remember.” Ross nodded.

“Yup, that’s Raphael, Hayley right next to him and there are Jackson and (y/n)”

“Awesome, nice to meet you, I’m Chris!”

“Wait, you do OneyPlays right?” Jackson spoke up to which Chris threw up his hands in a gesture of feigned defeat. “You got me.”

After another minute of standing around had passed, Chris decided to simply sit down along with all of you, Lyle wouldn’t be showing up anymore anyway - his own words.

What surprised you about him was that talking to him felt very.. normal.

With the Grumps for example there was this feeling of “Oh my god they are internet legends” and although they were just regular everyday people, it still felt surreal talking to them.

The atmosphere in the bar was casual, like you couldn’t make any mistakes and as everyone was agitated in conversation, you realized that living here and working with all of them might actually turn out to be a really fun experience.

Thank you for all the love you've expessed toward Ximena in my fic guys 🥹 her character weaving into the narrative was very unplanned and unexpected. Here's a bit of one of her letters to V post jayvik divorce

Direct link to the fic

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61602655/chapters/157489549

The way this bookmark made me CACKLE HAHAHAHA

Direct link for those who are into neurodivergency and emotional calamity I suppose 😂

Very* WIP for chapter 26 - who's ready for the divorce 😭

Direct Link

Ready for some audible oofs?

I'm close to being done 🕺 it's the longest chapter to date 😩 (WIP CH 25)

Direct link

I'm super curious.

WIP Chapter 24! 🫃

Let's talk about sex, baby! 🕺

Direct link

Viktor not knowing what to do with himself when Jayce is shirtless is very dear to me

❄️ Modern au, high tension slowest of burns 🔞 (101k and counting), friends to enemies to friends to lovers, scientific competition, petty lab-wars, major angst, major pinning, major yearning, soulmate connection.

Thank you for being so welcoming in this fandom 💜 I'm adoring interacting with each of you and there's so much talent it's crazy 😭😭😭

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61602655/chapters/157489549

Direct Link

Here are the tags, if it's of interest to any of you 🫶🥹

Viktor's in love, your honor.

❄️ Modern au, high tension slowest of burns 🔞 (111k and counting), friends to enemies to friends to lovers, scientific competition, petty lab-wars, major angst, major pinning, major yearning, soulmate connection.

I know I say this a lot but thank you for being so welcoming in this fandom 💜 I'm having the most wonderful time and there's so much talent it's crazy 😭😭😭

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61602655/chapters/157489549

Direct link

Here are the tags, if it's of interest to any of you 🫶🥹

Have a nice day!

You know when you get to that part of the enemies to lovers where the bickering is also half flirty? Jayvik in action 🫶

(First picture starts mid paragraph in "Leaning in...")

❄️ Modern au, high tension slowest of burns 🔞 (111k and counting), friends to enemies to friends to lovers, scientific competition, petty lab-wars, major angst, major pinning, major yearning, lots of love and soulmate connection.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61602655/chapters/157489549

Direct link

Thank you, once again, for being such a welcoming community. I've been loving interacting with people in this fandom😭🫶

Here are the tags

I'm all for Jayce beginning his gay awakening 🥹🫶 also cheers to nonbinary viktor 😎

❄️ Modern au, high tension slowest of burns 🔞 (101k and counting), friends to enemies to friends to lovers, scientific competition, petty lab-wars, major angst, major pinning, major yearning, soulmate connection.

I've been having the absolute best time interacting with the jayvik community, you guys are awesome 🫶 it's honestly been such a joy to post this 🥹

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61602655/chapters/157489549

Direct link

Here are the tags just in case

Have a great day!

Chapter 20 is out 😭💜

Our babies are dancing after the distinguished innovators competition, holding each other as GOD INTENDED

❄️ Modern au, slowest of burns, friends to enemies to friends to lovers, petty lab-wars, major angst, major pinning, major yearning, soulmate connection, and just so much LOVE.

Direct link to the fic

Here's a tidbit

Thank you for the endless joy this community brings. I am having the best time interacting with other jayvikers, so thank you so so much.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61602655/chapters/157489549

Here are the tags

I am taking forever with the new chapter, my apologies. Will probably try to upload this weekend 🫶

Anybody else into deep internal declarations of love? 😭 Viktor surrendering to love will always be a trope close to my heart.

Here's an excerpt of just that!

...forcibly trudging forward. (That's how the paragraph ends, couldn't fit it)

❄️Modern au, scientific competition, friends to enemies to friends to lovers. A lot of yearning, angst, pinning, hurt/comfort, petty lab-wars, soulmate connection.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61602655/chapters/157489549

Direct link

I've been adoring interacting with the jayvik fandom. You guys are honestly awesome.

I'll leave the tags below in case you're interested! :-)

Have a great day, tumblr 🫶

Let me cook ☝️ (jayvik fanfic WIP)

❄️ Modern au, slowest of burns, friends to enemies to friends to lovers, petty lab-wars, major angst, major pinning, major yearning, soulmate connection, and just so much LOVE for one another. 19 chapters already out!!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61602655/chapters/157489549

Direct link

Interacting with jayvik fans has been like a breath of fresh air in my life. Hence, my being here. Thanks for this wonderful community, guys.

Here are the tags

Chapter 19 is out 💜

❄️Modern au, scientific competition, friends to enemies to lovers, high tension slow burn, 🔞

Where are my words of affirmation jayvikers? 😭 V isn't loose when his compliments, but when he does compliment... 😭😭😭😭

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61602655/chapters/157489549

Link

I'm having the best time interacting with people in this fandom 🥹🫶 thank you.

Chapter 18 is out 🥹 What's some harmless flirting between lab-partners? 👀

If anyone enjoys modern aus, the slowest of burns, friends to enemies to friends to lovers, scientific competition, petty lab-wars, genuine care, so much angst, so much yearning, soulmate shit, with a special fuck you to our shitty ass capitalistic nightmare of reality, then this fic might be for you 🥹

Interacting with other jayvik fans has been a breath of fresh air, you've brought me so much joy and company. Hence, why I am here 🥹 so we can huddle up if we share anything in common. 😌

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61602655/chapters/157489549

Link

So I'm waiting a fic about jayvik because interacting with jayvik fans has been like wearing an oxygen mask in this moment of my life

If you're into modern AU, scientific competition, slowest of burns, friends to enemies to friends to lovers, petty lab wars, soul mate shit, then i will leave you the link :)

I leave you with some screenshots of fluffy moments because God knows we need those in this economy.

Please feel free to interact if you feel so inclined. Makes my day every time.

The Lie of Providence - Chapter 6 - Venom to My Ears

word count: 3745

Pairing: Recom Miles Quaritch x Female! Sully! Na'vi Reader Tags/Warnings: hurt, anger, no comfort, bullying, dysmorphia, lots of crying

Author's Note: And we're back! Sorry this took soooo long to come out! Haha, totally got distracted by WDITMF  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Anyway apologies for any grammatical errors as usual!

“blue text” is spoken Na'vi.

‘Italics’ are thoughts.

iortsyal = a pandorian butterfly

[previous chapter] | 6 | [next chapter]

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

You remember it quite clearly.

You were 14 then, and it happened so unexpectedly. Tarsem has taken 3 other teenagers, boys them all, under his tutelage as future hunters and warriors.

From the beginning you could tell these 3 were a close nit group, perhaps friends since their younger years. Rokan (15) is the leader, whilst Ru’ak (14) and Teka (14), the twins, were his little followers.

They paid you no mind, as far as you can tell; just another trainee they only saw when they spent time with Tarsem.

A spar was called between you and Rokan, Tarsem wanting to assess both of your progress thus far.

Late in the afternoon, the group found a small clearing, you and Rokan front and centre, the twins somewhere behind Tarsem off to the side.

You readied yourself; low crouch, find your centre, just like father taught you. Rokan stands tall, starts walking to the side as if to circle you. You mimic his movements, making sure to keep him in front of your line of sight.

However this is what he had wanted, had predicted. When he felt the sun kiss his bare back, he rushed you without warning. You squinted as the sun assaulted your sensitive eyes. But that wasn’t what you were paying attention to, no.

You stared only ahead at the figure coming at you. Drenched in gold, you think you have never seen such ethereal beauty. The evening light explodes behind him as he approaches, casting his front in shadow. You feel the rapid pounding of your heart, the quickness of your breath.

He is on you before you can even blink. Tackled to the ground, he pins you and you flail wildly, trying to free yourself, but it is of little use.

“Enough. Separate.” Tarsem calls from the side lines. Rokan obeys without question, the twins hollering his praises. You sit up and watch his retreating back as he makes his way over to them. ‘Was he always that athletic?’ the thought catches you so completely off-guard you let out a quiet ‘eep’! Covering your mouth, you get up in a rush and move to your side. You don’t see the quick glance Rokan does behind himself to look at you.

A few more matches, and a few more pins to the ground, Tarsem calls it. 8 matches, 8 losses. Rokan is full to the brim with pride. He has beaten Tarsem’s star pupil, firstborn of the Olo'eyktan, and he couldn’t be happier.

Tarsem sends the 3 boys off. They eagerly scurry away, playfully pushing each other, arms wrapped around each other’s neck in brotherly fashion. You watch them, envious almost. Yes, you do have the friendship and comfort of your many siblings; but there some times when, you wish you too had friends closer to your age. Boy or girl, it didn’t matter to you.

“[Y/N].” Tarsem addresses you, pulling your attention from the boys.

“Yes???” You respond, flustered at being caught staring.

“You were distracted today.”

You’re not sure if he’s making a statement or asking you.

“Yes, Tarsem. I…apologise. It will not happen again.” He has his arms crossed and nods at you, waving you off for the evening.

You bid him farewell and begin the trek to your next lesson.

“He is a very handsome young man though.” Tarsem calls from behind you. You stop dead and turn to face him, face flushed red, mouth agape in horror. Tarsem only smiles widely trying his best to stifle a laugh. You hasten your retreat to a full-on sprint, all the while you can hear Tarsem’s laugh slowly fading behind you.

---

Ok.

So you think he’s cute.

Handsome even.

Big deal.

So what???

No really. So what?

You have no idea what to do with this information. It’s not as if you’re overflowing with spare time to pursue, whatever this is. A silly crush. Nothing more. But this was the first time you’ve ever experienced romantic feelings in any capacity.

As a result, you unfortunately start noticing him around the village more. You wonder if he often frequented the same areas as you. Did you perhaps never notice until now?

He never approaches you, nor do the twins. Always does he simply greet you with a smirk and quick gesture of the hand. By Eywa, that smile. That damned smile. You feel heat rush up your neck to your cheeks every accursed time. How embarrassing.

A few weeks pass, and something most unexpectedly happens.

He does in fact, approach you.

“[Y/N]!” He waves you down, jogging up to you, the other two not far behind.

“Ro-Rokan! Ru’ak and Teko too. What can I do for you three?”

“Are you free right now? We’re about to head out into the forest, and wanted to know if you wanna join us?”

“M-me?” You curse yourself for stammering in front of him.

“Of course! We’re all warriors in training together. Makes sense to me that we should get to know each other a little better, don’t you agree?”

Your heart feels as though it’s doing flips against your ribcage. You inwardly squeal with joy. As luck would have it, this was your day of rest, so you indeed had free time!

“Y-yes of course! I’d be happy to!” You fondly smile upward to the taller boy, brimming with excitement.

You had remained cordial with the other teens of the clan around your age, but you’ve never actually hung out with any of them. This was your chance to amend that, and actually make friends outside the family. That thought alone has iortsyal fluttering in your stomach.

---

The three of you stop at the edge of the village. Rokan teases you with a smirk, challenging you to keep up. Your heart skips, and you feel heat on your cheeks.

He doesn’t wait for you to respond and immediately rushes off into the forest. You don’t think twice before you’re immediately on his trail, the twins keep pace behind you.

You barely register the world around you, relying solely on your instincts to guide you forward. Your eyes are fixed to the azure back just a few branches ahead of you. You become hypnotised by the lean muscle, and swallow thickly as a sheen slowly spreads upon his broad back.

You shake your head, trying to rid yourself of these thoughts before they fall into depravity. You can’t afford to be distracted, not out here at least. The forest is dangerous if you are caught unawares. With renewed focus, you push yourself harder, urging yourself to go faster. You feel the fire of your muscles burning, the ache of your pounding heart, but you relish in the feeling; it is a reminder of your strength, of your training, of being alive.

Up ahead, the spaces between the last tree and the next is too large to clear with a jump, but their branches connect in a bend to the left. You see Rokan veer to the side, taking the safe part. He is still a little ways ahead of you.

You look at the drop, contemplating the odds of you making the jump. It is then you notice the thick vines dangling in the empty space. You smirk to yourself and move even faster than you thought yourself capable of.

You don’t hear the twins both yell out to you as you launch yourself forward, hand outstretched. Your eyes briefly meet Rokan’s as you look to your left. His widen in shock as he watches you fly through the air. Your hands meets vine, and you grab with all your might.

You use the momentum of your flight to propel yourself forward to another vine, repeating the motion once again, before you launch yourself at the flattened branches of the tree ahead. You lurch forwards, coming into a roll as you land. The momentum pushes you forward, and you are instantly back into a sprint.

One quick glance behind and you see Rokan’s shocked face as he just finishes the detour. You don’t even see the twins. You laugh loud and breathlessly, yelling out to them to keep up and to stop being so low. You refuse to wipe the smile off your face as you continue forward. You’re not sure when last you had this much fun. It felt different from when you play with your siblings. There was just something about being around people your own age. Your heart swells with an unknown feeling, and it only makes you smile wider.

From the vantage point in the trees, you can see a large body of water in the distance. It is framed by a cliff side with a waterfall. The darkness of its colour lend credence to its depths. If this was the direction Rokan was going, then it stands to reason that this plunge pool was surely the destination.

You run along the thin branch stretching over the water, and dive down, head first, without hesitation.

In the blink of an eye you’re surrounded by the biting cold of water. You make it half way to the bottom of the pool, before you change direction and start swimming to the top. You breach the surface, taking one big gulp as you make your way to the nearest edge. You pull yourself out, flopping onto your back with a heavy thud. Your eyes are unfocused as you lay there, staring up into the canopy. Your breathing is laborious, and every muscle aches something fierce.

It doesn’t stop the giggle that bubbles up inside you; bursting forth in a cacophony of laughter. You let out a triumphant howl, pumping your firsts into the air victoriously.

---

Rokan sees the gap approaching, and knows he can’t make that jump. He sees the side path, and takes it. He’s almost half way when he hears the twins yelling your name somewhere behind him. He looks to his right and is completely stunned by what he sees.

Your silvery form soars through the sky, arm outstretched. His eyes meet yours for the briefest of moments, before you look forward once again. There is a falter to his step as he watches you clear the gap by swinging on the vines. You’re so far ahead now. He sees you look back once he makes it back to the path. He barely makes out your laughter and the tease you throw to the wind for them to keep up.

He stops dead in his tracks.

The twins finally catch up, you’re naught but a white smudge in the distance against the dark greens of the forest.

“This is far enough.” He tells the twins, holding out his arm to stop them from advancing. They stand there silently, the only sound their laboured breaths. Rokan lets out an amused huff as he sees you disappear when you take the dive.

“Heh…Unbelievable.” He shakes his head. He stares at where you once were for but a moment longer, before turning back and making his way toward the village.

“Let’s go.” The twins nod and follow him without question.

---

Ten minutes pass; it instead feels something akin to an hour. Anxiety weaves it way into you, deep into the pit of your stomach. There was no sound of bodies hitting water. No laughter from rambunctious boys catching up to you.

You sit on your knees beside the water, soaked, hands clenched tight. Your body starts shaking involuntarily.

At first, you thought perhaps they were afraid to dive, and were searching for a safer way down. But as each minute passed by, the truth became clearer.

They had left you. For reasons you have yet to conjure, they had abandoned you here. You fight the quiver of your lip as tears sting your eyes. But as you are now, you are powerless. You fall to your sudden grief, letting out a straggled cry as tears flow free. You wrap your arms around yourself as you weep.

You are cut deep by unpleasant emotions. These are feelings you are unaccustomed to.

Why did they leave you?

Did you do something to offend them?

What were they thinking?

Did they even want to hang out with you in the first place?

Was this their plan all along?

Were they ever intending to be your friend?

Questions like this flood your mind, drowning you in a sudden wave of self-doubt.  You let loose a scream until your throat burns.

---

Time passes, and your tears eventually dry. You look at your reflection in the water, and nearly recoil. Your face is red, eyes puffy, angry streaks of dried tears paint your cheeks. You stare intently at yourself then, taking in the golden threads of your braids, and the starlit white of your skin.

You wonder then, if things would have played out differently, had you been born normal looking.

You frown, clenching your teeth as you feel anger slowly start to burn within. You swat away the image angrily, wildly splashing the water about.

It was no secret to you, that you were born different. But it never bothered you. Your family treated you no different from your siblings, and by Eywa neither did any of the Sky People.

So why now? Why them?

…Were they the only ones?

You shake your head, pulling yourself from yet venturing down that train of thought. You take a moment to wash your face. The cool water helps ground you, calming you. You drink deep, sighing contently.

You pull yourself to your feet, and take stock of where exactly you are. You observe your surroundings, trying to find familiarity with the Great Mother’s design. But none of the surrounding area invokes any sort of recognition. You look up into the canopy, and you can vaguely make out the thin branch you dove from. It would seem, the only way back to that tree would be to scale the waterfall. Wonderful.

You sigh in defeat, but nonetheless make your way around the pool to some outcroppings you can scale.

The climb would not normally wind you, but your body still aches from the strain of your sprinting prior. Your mind still reels, broiled in anger from everything that has transpired.

With an angry grunt, you hoist yourself up to the top of the cliff.

You look up from your crouched position, and freeze.

All of your anger, all of your sadness, every turbulent emotion, is rend from your body.

You mind goes blank, mouth suddenly dry, mind blank.

You do not blink.

Drinking from the stream, nought but a few feet away, is a palulukan.

An adult palulukan.

The creatures ears are pointed toward you. It clearly heard you, but did not turn its head to regard you, instead choosing to finish its drink.

There is a lump in your throat, but you are too shaken to even swallow. Fear overwhelms you, and you are unable to move. To run. You know you should let the fear pass over and through you. But repeating mantras was not the same as putting it into practice.

You curse those boys, but most of all, you curse yourself. You should have paid attention. You should have known better. Had you been smarter, more aware, maybe you would have noticed you were running straight into palulukan territory. Your mind is too frazzled to even send silent prayers to the Great Mother.

You don’t even have any of your decent weaponry on you. Fuck.

The creature finishes its drink, and licks it lips before turning its head in your direction.

But when your eyes meet, something strange happens. You expect the creature to growl lowly, lower its stance, as if ready to pounce.

Instead, once your eyes meet, it freezes.

You barely have time to make a confused face, before the palulukan lets out the most terrifying roar you have ever heard.

But it is not the roar of an apex predator warning prey to run.

This was something of fear.

It snarls and bares its fangs, banging its front paws into ground as it roars at you again. But it never moves closer, staying exactly where it was. Still you are frightened by its very visage.

You flinch.

With swiftness you wish you possessed, the creature suddenly turns and sprints off deeper into the forest.

You sit stock still as you listen to its fading footfalls.

‘What was that?’

‘By the Great Mother, what the fuck was that?!’

You bring your hands up to your face, and realise you are shaking. Adrenaline still courses through your veins. You launch yourself up, and sprint in the opposite direction of where the beast ran.

You dare not turn around.

---

You make it back to village, but you are far from unscathed.

Small cuts mar your skin. In your haste to escape, you became carless; tripping and tumbling over yourself. Your lucky your hands and feet remain clear, but the same cannot be said for your arms and legs. The adrenaline stops you from feeling any pain.

You stop yourself once you make it into the village, bracing yourself on a nearby tree. You fall to your knees, huffing and puffing. You hand clenches your chest as you desperately try to calm your beating heart; it feels as though it will burst forth from your chest.

“Well, look who made it back! Took you long enough, freak.”

You feel yourself go rigid. The voice beside you, addressing you, belongs to none other than Rokan. You don’t move to look at him. Not that it matters. He instead moves to be in your line of sight. You force yourself to look up and at him. He’s smirking down at you, arms crossed over his chest. You vaguely register the twins standing behind him, crouching to be at your level. They’re quietly laughing as they point at you, whispering to each other.

You struggle with all your might to stand up straight, using the tree as leverage. But your legs are threatening to give out, and you painfully slump back against the tree with a pained grunt.

The boys laugh at you.

His words slice into you. But it is not the clean cut of a swift blade. This is serrated, cutting into you slowly with meaningful precision.

“You really are pathetic, you know that? I can’t believe Eywa cursed Toruk Makto. I’m honestly surprised you even made it back alive right now. How stupid were you to not even notice where we were running, hm?”

“Oh well, and here I thought I could be rid of you…”

“W-why…? I haven’t done…anything…to you…” Getting the words out is laborious as you desperately try to catch your breath.

“Pfft! Why? Is this skxáwng serious?” He playfully nudges one of the boys beside him.

“Let me clue you in on a little secret, freak. We don’t like you—I don’t like you! And did you think I wouldn’t notice? The way you look at me? Disgusting. As if I would ever be interested in a freak.”

You flinch at his words, and cast you gaze downward; too ashamed to meet his eyes.

“Did you really think because you were the daughter of Olo'eyktan, of Toruk Makto, that it made you special? Look at yourself! Your Sky People hair. That pale skin. You will never be true Na’vi. Face it, [Y/N]…Eywa cursed you. Honestly, I was doing the clan a favour by leaving you there.”

You don’t think you’ve ever heard your name said with such disgust, in your entire life. You don’t know what to do, how to react. The deep gnawing pit in your stomach grows with the pain in your heart. You can’t help the silent tears that fall.

There is no sympathy to be had. Rokan simply laughs at you.

“Aww, Rokan. You made it cry, that’s so mean~!” You dare to look up, and feel the cracks in your heart splinter. A girl approaches, nestling herself into Rokan’s side as she stops beside him. You recognise her. Vekya. You were acquaintances at best. What little interactions you two had were always cordial as far as you can recall. But the sneer on her face speaks volumes. Had she always looked at you like this, when you back was turned?

How many in the clan felt the same then?

You’re overcome with anxiety once more. You can’t be around them. Not under their stares. Not under their eyes.

And so you run.

You hear their laughter fade into the background as you sprint away, not entirely caring where you end up.

---

You hiccup as you cry at the recollection, your throat clenching painfully. You want to continue, but it would seem your body has other ideas.

Your mother stares at you, the hold on your hands almost painful.

She sees the tears streaming down your face.

She sees the pain in your eyes.

The scars of your heart.

The sorrow in your soul.

And she sees...

RED.

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Author's Note: So you may notice your age is lowered. I went back and decided I want reader to be a bit younger. Also I changed that you and Miles haven't given each other your names yet. Thank you to everyone for your patience!

Please let me know if you want to be added to the taglist! I also started a permanent taglist, so if you want to be on that instead, let me know :) Also if your name isn't underlined, it means I couldn't tag you for some reason :(

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