Who Knows - Blog Posts

Channeling Bella for a bit- she must be terrified when Doey snaps at her because what if it means he doesn't like her anymore? What if he's bored of carrying her around and hearing her problems? If she gets taken off this project she'll go back to the work yard where no one wants to talk to her. The scientists might even consider her defective and just terminate her! What can she do, how can she make things better when the only thing she can do is talk? Is she even worth talking to anymore? It's going to be a long, painful silence until He decides to talk again.

I'm just gonna put what @squidling2005 put in the tags on this post as well:

And I am just going to grin very very loudly because I have clearly done something right here where people are going "Oh no???" from both sides of the fence ehehe. I was so worried that interaction would feel very one-sided, so the sheer relief I feel knowing that both sides make sense... and both of you are completely on the money. Before a sort of system, understanding is worked out it is a long and drawn out thing.

Neither of them know how to make the first move here. Bella is hyper aware of how much her entire situation hinges on him caring, if she makes him upset and he decides to stop caring anymore, she's toast. Course... somehow, the scariest part of that thought was the idea that he wouldn't want to be her friend anymore. It felt...realer, made her stomach hurt and her throat clench. He was a bit weird but he was also so nice and even though it was her fault the scientists could make him do all those things he didn’t want to, he never got mad at her for it… she pushed too hard, she could barely remember how to be a friend and she messed it all up.

Doey meanwhile is drowning under his own guilt, quite literally pressing himself as far into the corner as he can. He’s not bad they just made him wrong! He couldn’t help his head got so loud! And and and and- and he almost bit her, if he bit her she would probably die wouldn’t she? He hadn’t ever bitten anything living before but he knew very confidently she wouldn't survive… but even if she didn’t she would never like him again. She would be smart not to, why would you be friends with someone who hurt you… so he curls up as tight as he can and stays as far away as he can. Ofc this only can last so long, Doey is given a small (very small) amount of leniency with his form shifting but soon Bella is getting zapped and he has to pull himself back in shape.

I think at first they handle it by pretending nothing happened, they sit quietly at opposite ends of the room until he gets shuffled off to his containment cell for the night, then the next morning when reunited for work they just pretend the whole situation hadn’t even happened. They’re both kids, they don’t know what they’re doing, so they assume if they don’t talk about it then they can pretend it didn’t happen- until it happens again, and it’s worse. They end up sitting in silence for a while… but I think he makes the first move

Afterwards, while it doesn’t go perfect because they both lack the ability to truly explain how they feel and both are incredibly hesitant to admit their true thoughts, the pair of them manage to establish some understanding. Sometimes his head gets very, very loud, and when it happens he has to sit very quietly until it goes away. He didn’t mean to yell or bite, he didn’t mean to scare, he doesn’t want her to be scared of him. He promises he won’t do it again, he will, he will be much better!!

And Bella cries, or as close to crying as she can get in this body, because she didn’t mean to make him upset and she was so so afraid he didn’t like her anymore. And of course he is immediately insisting, desperately so, that he still likes her, that he was never mad at her!!! He’s not capable of crying anymore physically, but he has memories of the sounds, he can make those still. They manage to bumble their way through the idea that sometimes he gets very mad at nothing and yells at everything. Once again, it’s not perfect, no one feels great, but there is a sense of understanding.

Lucas helps a lot, for as loud and goofy as he is he clearly understands what is happening a lot better than both of them combined. Kids are observant, even if they don’t fully understand what they are observing, but both Lucas and Bella learn the signs of when he needed space. Were they older, more experienced, I am sure a way to actually help him through these moments could have been figured out, but the best they can do is just let them pass by.

Hopefully this comic text hybrid makes sense and is alright!! I had some ideas I didn’t know how to type, and some I couldn’t quite draw haha!

Phelzah no

👪 + bonus points for a deep dive how he feels about his mom specifically

x 👪 - What’s their relationship with their parents like?

((What if I don't want your bonus points- sjdhfbhj

Father: Rody's always looked up to his father. Admired how hard he worked and how he took care of him and his siblings. He was a kind soul -haha- and Rody wanted to be just like him. After his dad left, all that admiration kinda went out the window. He resented him. He was angry and upset that their own dad could just up and leave them with no warning. To leave Rody with the duty of providing for what little family they have left.

After the events of Humarise, there's a new mix of emotions stirring within Rody. The admiration for his dad is definitely back, seeing as the guy was forced to work for the organization and never wanted to leave them to begin with- he left to keep their family safe. Rody would have done the same to protect his siblings. But now Rody also feels some kind of guilt... It’s a hard feeling to describe, but he feels bad that he’s hated his dad for such a long time when he was still good all along. And now he’s dead. Here Rody was, shoving his dad to the back of his mind all these years, and now he’s come to find out the truth. It sucks.

Mother: Holds literally no grudges against her. She was lovely and brightened up any room she was in and balanced out Rody’s father perfectly. She was funny. Rody only knew her in his younger years, and absolutely adored her. The family was obviously heart broken after her passing, but kept her memory alive. The grief has lessened over the years, but sometimes it still hits hard. Especially when he thinks about how little time his siblings got to spend with her. Well for Lala, it was basically no time at all. Rody desperately wishes that Lala could have grown up around a mother-like figure. He can only do so much on his own, and he knows that having some “girl-time” would be nice for her. He’s glad that she can get that time with friends now, but it’s still not the same.))

I don’t know why I saved this picture, and I don’t know why I’m posting it.

Oh, well. Guess we’ll never know...

I love this because I often wonder what their dynamic really was before the crash. were they good friends? was it toxic and manipulative? has curly gone through the same treatment, but downplays it for himself because their relationship? did the abuse only start after? It can only be assumed what the dynamic mightve been based on Curly's response to Anya and the treatment he faced post crash. It's clear that Jimmy has this inherent need for power and enjoys reveling in it, even if it's stolen. but we know nothing of anyone's past other than Swanseas. it could've been a behavior that formed after working in the tulpar or he could've always been this way. maybe he repressed it in the beginning, luring Curly into a false sense of security, and it becoming an on-and-off thing. maybe Curly repressed any memories of Jimmy ever doing anything. Maybe he even told Anya that he'd do something to comfort her, knowing he couldn't; not only because they were "friends", but because he knew what would happen to him.

Either way, Curly is both the witness and victim as you said.

Also I'm incredibly sleep deprived rn so I hope this makes sense

Curly isn’t just a “man protecting a man” from his actions, he’s an amazing juxtaposition of both victim and witness. There is an unspoken story of potential sexual abuse in the relationship between Curly and Jimmy told exclusively through the pill sequences. The choking and gasping as Curly is forced to have pill after pill shoved down his throat while Jimmy gets his own private high off of knowing the power he now holds over the ex-captain. Anya isn’t the only one being forced to take blame from her rapist, Curly experiences a similar experience as Jimmy contemplates cannibalising him, forcing his autonomy over Curly’s own and blaming him for making him do something Curly has no control over.

javey. dave is performing with an orchestra and has like 3 massive solos, jacks come to support bc why wouldn't he come watch his crush best friend perform the performance of his LIFE.

the performance goes REALLY well, davey absolutely eats it up, and finds jack after the concert and they walk home tgt to their shared dorm. along the walk, davey complains and complains how hot his concert blacks are and then as soon as their dorm door closes, the tie and the shirt and the shoes all come off at once. davey is a master at taking clothes off fast, and now all he's in are a pair of pants fitted very nicely around the waist.

jack falls over dave goes jack what happened are you feeling lightheaded, jack tries to remain suave as this Hot Ass Man is helping him up and rubbing his back consolingly .... then they kiss or whatever